Veronica: Georgie.
Georgie: So, listen, I was doing my prayers last night and, uh, you won't believe it, but I think God spoke to me.
Veronica: Really? What did he say?
Georgie: Well, I couldn't understand all of it, 'cause it was in an ancient language, but the part I did understand is he wants us to spend more time together.
Veronica: Doing what?
Georgie: Oh, you know, praying, helping the needy. Your usual Christian activities.
Veronica: Well, I'm okay with that.
Georgie: Good. So you, me and God, we'll hang out.
Veronica: Sounds good.
Georgie: Okay. See you later.
Veronica: See you.
Georgie: I may be going to hell.

Mary: [inner monologue] Lord, please look after my family. Give them everything they need to be happy and healthy. And this lovely young girl with me tonight, help her stay on the path of righteousness.
Veronica: [inner monologue] God, please look after my sister. You can find her at the women's correctional facility in Lubbock. Help her seek salvation in you instead of cocaine, marijuana and bass players.
Georgie: [inner monologue] Jesus, I'm sure, even from Heaven, you can see how hot the girl sitting next to me is. And I know I'm not supposed to pray for myself, but here's the deal: if you can get her to fall in love with me, and you know, make some bad decisions, I swear I'll come to church every Sunday.
Mary: [inner monologue] And thank you for bringing Georgie tonight, even though you and I both know why he came. Speaking of which, whatever he's praying for right now, ignore it.
Veronica: [inner monologue] And please protect me from impure thoughts, and teach me to respect the sanctity of my body.
Georgie: [inner monologue] Now if for instance she and I were to go skinny dipping and one thing were to lead to another under the moonlit sky, get this: not only do I become a devout Christian, I will also bug everybody I meet to do the same. And you know I can be real annoying when I set my mind to it.
Mary: [inner monologue] Amen.
Veronica: [inner monologue] Amen.
Georgie: [inner monologue] I'm gonna take your silence as a yes. Amen.

Georgie: Then sings my soul, my savior God-
Mary: Oh, who do you think you're fooling here?
Georgie: I have no idea what you're talking about.
Mary: Listen to me. Veronica has a rough family situation, and she's trying to improve her life.
Georgie: And I admire that. Very inspirational.
Mary: Georgie, believe me, I'm glad to see you in a church, but I do not want you taking advantage of that girl.
Georgie: Taking advantage? Veronica and I are Bible buddies, nothing more. I'm serious.
Mary: Right.
Georgie: Maybe you should ask yourself what's in you that makes you see sin in the hearts of others.
Mary: Okay, now you're pushing it.
Georgie: Lord Jesus, please help my mother with her anger. Can I get an amen?
Mary: No!

Georgie: You want to hang out Saturday?
Veronica: Can't. I signed up to get baptized.
Georgie: Oh, yeah. I've been meaning to do that.
Veronica: Well, why don't you join me? We could do it together.
Georgie: Sure. You and me, getting double dunked. I like it.
Veronica: Can you imagine afterwards? All of our sins will be washed away.
Georgie: Yeah, and we can start cranking out fresh ones.

Veronica: What do you want?
Georgie: I just wanted to apologize again. My behavior was crazy. I blame hormones.
Veronica: Really? 'Cause I blame you.
Georgie: Is there any way you can forgive me?
Veronica: Please. Fine. I forgive you.
Georgie: You're not just saying it 'cause you're trying to be a good Christian and you're afraid of going to Hell?
Veronica: Do you want me to forgive you or not?
Georgie: Very much.
Veronica: Then stop talking and let's move on.
Georgie: So so we're friends again?
Veronica: Sure.
Georgie: Just as friends, would you wanna hang out on Saturday night? In a no-kissing and no-punching-in- the-face kind of way?
Veronica: I can't. My boyfriend's taking me to dinner.

Veronica: Georgie, check it out.
Georgie: Oh, man, I hate that he's doing this.
Veronica: What? It's cute.
Georgie: It's embarrassing.
Veronica: I would think you'd be proud of him.
Georgie: That's 'cause you're a better person than me.
Veronica: Maybe you ought to ask God to take away your anger and replace it with love.
Georgie: Can I ask him to take away my brother instead?
Veronica: Georgie.
Georgie: Not kill him Just strand him on an island somewhere. A nice island, with coconuts and stuff.

Pastor Jeff: Mary, George, I can't thank you enough for this.
Georgie: It was our pleasure.

Missy: I'm going to hell. I'm going to hell.
Georgie: Relax. Not until you're dead.

Mary: You also will not stare at him during dinner.
Sheldon: Can I look at him at all?
Mary: Yes.
Sheldon: How long can I look at him before it's considered staring?
Georgie: When I'm trying not to stare at girls, my rule is "two Mississippi".
George: I taught him that.

Dr. John Sturgis: Well, I realize being here after ending my romantic relationship with Connie is unusual. So, as before, I'm perfectly happy to answer any questions that you might have.
Missy: I have a question. Can I eat in front of the TV?
Mary: Sure.
Georgie: Let's get back to The Shining. When them elevator doors open, oh, man.

Georgie: It just don't make no sense. If I'm gonna pay for it with my own money, why can't I get a TV for my bedroom?
George: You have so much money, why don't you save it for college?
Georgie: If you're not gonna take this seriously, I don't even know why I'm talking to you.

George: Hey, John, nice to see ya.
Dr. John Sturgis: You, too. Uh, brought some snacks for the game.
George: How nice.
Dr. John Sturgis: Hope you like grapes.
Georgie: Oh, there's nothing my dad loves more than football and grapes.
George: Why don't you head on in to the den, John? [to Georgie] You, get lost.
Georgie: So you two can feed each other grapes? Got it.

Georgie: First of all, you got to cough even when Mom's not in the room.
Sheldon: Got it. [coughing]
Georgie: And don't put the thermometer in the tea. 114 fever is a giveaway.
Sheldon: Smart.
Missy: Told you.
Georgie: Oh, don't be afraid to let her look in your throat. She's checking to see if it's red, but it's always red.
Sheldon: You are good.
Georgie: Here, try spitting up a little phlegm.
Sheldon: [clears throat, sniffs, splutters]
Georgie: We got work to do.

George: Well, I was thinking you and I could go grab a burger.
Georgie: Why?
George: 'Cause I thought it'd be a nice thing to do.
Georgie: Which restaurant?
George: Why does it matter?
Georgie: Well, McDonald's burgers are fried, and sometimes I like flame-broiled.
George: Fine, we can go to Burger King.
Georgie: I don't like the fries at Burger King. Ooh, Arby's has those curly fries. Shoot, they don't have burgers.
George: [tersely] Then let's go to Whataburger.
Georgie: Okay, but I hope you're not this cranky the whole meal.
George: [exhales]

Georgie: I bet the guy who invented the spork is a millionaire.
Jana: I guess.
Georgie: I wonder if his last name is Spork.
Jana: It comes from "spoon" and "fork." Spork.
Georgie: Oh, my God. Mind is blown.