George Jr.: Here you go. Ooh, sweet bear. I'll give you 20 bucks for it.

George Jr.: [to customer] Just go around to the alley. The password is "dryer sheet."
Mary: This is not a joke. I'm worried about your soul.
George Jr.: I'm not gambling. No one's getting hurt.
Mary: Georgie, I know you think that, but this does hurt people.
George Jr.: It's not my business what people do with their money. And it ain't your business, either, so butt out.

George Jr.: Found the manual.
Meemaw: Great. [looks at manual] This is for the washing machines.
George Jr.: I'll be back.

Mandy: And now I'm here, hoping I don't run into anybody I went to high school with.
George Jr.: Well, I think you're safe. Loretta there is one of our younger customers.
Mandy: Oh. Seems like a good place to meet girls.
George Jr.: I met you. But play it cool. Loretta can get real jealous.
Mandy: [whispers]: Okay.

Chloe: [to Georgie] Here we go, two margaritas. You need a chair?
George Jr.: No, she's good.
Chloe: Okay. Be back in a sec to take your order.
Meemaw: I love their margaritas.
George Jr.: Yeah, but I'm driving, so I'll probably just have a sip or two. [off Meemaw's look] Or none. I'm pretty full on chips.
Meemaw: [chuckles] He is such a responsible young man.
George Jr.: Well, this was fun.
Meemaw: It was for me. [to Mandy] Nice meeting you. [taps Georgie on the shoulder]

Mary: Well, don't you look nice.
Missy: Nice and boring, thanks to you.
Mary: Is everyone gonna be crabby today?
George Jr.: I've been a delight.

Mandy: Okay, so, uh, when do I get to see your yearbook?
George Jr.: Actually... I dropped out my senior year.
Mandy: Oh.
George Jr.: I'm sorry for not telling you sooner.
Mandy: No, it's okay.
George Jr.: Yeah?
Mandy: Yeah. So what other secrets are you hiding from me? You got a wife and kids?
George Jr.: No. But I'm not really 21. I'm 17.
Mandy: [laughs] [George is silent] What the...?!

Mandy: Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
George Jr.: It ain't that big of a deal.
Mandy: I just slept with a 17-year-old.
George Jr.: If you were a guy, you'd think that was cool.

George Jr.: Are you sure?
Mandy: [picks up pregnancy test] I'm sure.
George Jr.: Sometimes these things ain't accurate. Maybe take another one.
Mandy: [picks up another test] Here you go.
George Jr.: Two is convincing, but-but three...
Mandy: I'm pregnant, Georgie!
George Jr.: [sighs] What happens now?
Mandy: I don't know. I've never been knocked up by a 17-year-old before.
George Jr.: Well, if it helps, I turn 18 in March.

George Jr.: It's Georgie.
Mandy: [opens door] What?
George Jr.: I know I was a little freaked out the last time I was here.
Mandy: You should be.
George Jr.: But I had some time to think, and there's something I need to ask you.
Mandy: Yeah?
George Jr.: Are you sure that baby's mine?
[cut to Georgie in Dale's office again:]
George Jr.: She did not like that question at all.

George Jr.: Hey.
George Sr.: Your mother said you wanted to talk to me?
George Jr.: Yeah. Come in.
George Sr.: So, what's going on?
George Jr.: It's kind of hard to talk about.
George Sr.: Whatever it is, I'm here for you.
George Jr.: I... I got a girl pregnant.

George Sr.: You realize you have to tell your mother.
George Jr.: Well, I just told you. Maybe we let it sit awhile.
George Sr.: [stammers] I can't know this and keep it to myself.
George Jr.: Dale did. Like a champ.
George Sr.: [scoffs] Georgie, you have to tell her.
George Jr.: Fine. Will you at least be there?
George Sr.: Yeah.
George Jr.: And tell her?

Mary: What do we even know about this girl?
George Jr.: Well, that's the thing...
George Sr.: Buckle up.
George Jr.: She's 29.
Mary: Years old?! Oh, my... [stands up]
George Jr.: Guess we're standing again.
Mary: What kind of 29-year-old dates someone your age?!
George Jr.: Obviously the kind that was lied to.

George Jr.: I know it didn't go great the other night, but I meant what I said... I'll be there for you.
Mandy: Georgie, not now.
George Jr.: I'm serious. I'll go to baby classes with you. You need to learn that breathing stuff.
Mandy: Okay, one chicken fried steak and a cheeseburger.
George Jr.: Ain't you gonna refill their water?
Mandy: Go away!
George Jr.: Also, you'll be throwing up in the morning... I'm good with that. You may not know, but your feet are gonna swell up, and your boobs. I'll rub whatever you need rubbed.
Mandy: Good to know.
Cook: Table three, order up.
George Jr.: Want me to get that? You know, in your condition.
Mandy: Georgie, I got it.
George Jr.: Sorry, I'll quit bothering you.
Mandy: Great.
George Jr.: Just one more thing. I love you.
Mandy: What?
George Jr.: You ain't got to say it back.
Mandy: Yeah, I'm not gonna.
George Jr.: Don't forget their water!

George Jr.: So, that's it? Nobody else said anything?
[Mary and George both shake their heads]
George Jr.: Good. 'Cause her parents still don't know, and if this gets out, she's gonna be more pissed than ever.
Mary: Everything's gonna be fine. Let's just eat.
Missy: I... kind of told Heather M. at school. I told her to keep it a secret.
George Jr.: Did you keep it a secret?
Missy: No.
George Jr.: Unbelievable.
Mary: Actually, I told someone at church today.
George Sr.: And I might have told Wayne.
George Jr.: I can't believe y'all.
Sheldon: I know. You'd expect it from me, but from them, it's a shocker.
George Jr.: I ain't hungry. [storms out]

George Jr.: Mandy, please. I want to help.
Mandy: He can stay.
George Jr.: Thanks. What can I do?
Mandy: Nothing.
George Jr.: I can do that.

Mary: Georgie, how was your day?
George Jr.: Pretty good, actually. Me and Mandy went to the baby doctor.
Missy: She actually wanted you there?
George Jr.: Not at first, but I wore her down.

Wade: I'll take a beer.
George Jr.: Celebrating a win?
Wade: No, I've been losing all morning.
George Jr.: Couple more of them, you won't give a crap.
Wade: Let's hope.

George Jr.: So I'll pick you up in the morning?
Wade: Well, not too early. I have to walk Mitzy.
George Jr.: Your dog?
Wade: The wife. She got a new hip, and the doc says she needs to keep it moving.

Mary: I already know the first change I'm gonna make. Instead of calling it "Hell House," which is a little off-putting, I'm gonna call it "Heck House." Isn't that great?
George Sr.: That is great.
George Jr.: You don't really mean that.
George Sr.: Yes, I do.
George Jr.: Oh, I get it. Happy wife, happy life.
George Sr.: You need to stop talking.