Adult Sheldon: In the face of a chaotic world, we all seek comfort in different ways. Some turn to a higher power.
Mary: Lord, please protect my family, keep them in your hands. All my cares, all my worries, all my fears for them...
Adult Sheldon: Some take refuge in fictitious worlds.
Spock: [on TV] My congratulations, Captain. A dazzling display of logic.
Captain Kirk: [on TV] You didn't think I had it in me, did you, Spock?
Spock: [on TV] No, sir.
["Learning to Fly" by Tom Petty playing]
Sheldon: So great.
Adult Sheldon: And one person I know relied on lighter fluid and a match.
Missy: That's right, burn.
Mary: What are you doing?!
Missy: Moving on.
Mary: From what?

George Sr.: Missy, give us a minute.
Missy: No, I want to hear.
Dale: Look, sweetheart, I just think it's great you want to be on the team, but these boys are gonna eat you alive.
Missy: I'm not afraid of them.
Dale: Well, maybe you should be.

Mary: I just want to remind you both to please be sensitive about the situation with Paige's family.
Missy: She's talking to you, dingus.
Mary: Both of you.

Sheldon: I'm trying to sleep.
Paige: Come inside and play with us.
Missy: Don't invite him. This is a girls fort, not an old man fort.
Sheldon: I'm not an old man.
Paige: Then come inside.
Sheldon: Are you crazy? It's bedtime.
Missy: Old man.

Sheldon: I must admit, after the breakup, I was worried, but now that Dr. Sturgis and Dad are friends, we'll be seeing even more of him.
Missy: How do we see less of him?
Mary: That is not nice.
Missy: Sorry, but I'm on Meemaw's side. She got me a two-piece bathing suit.

Missy: What if Georgie moves into the garage?
George Jr.: Why?
Missy: You'd still be around, so Mom's happy, but you'd be out of the house, so Dad's happy.
George Jr.: That could work. What do you say?
George Sr.: Done.
George Jr.: Done.

Meemaw: I can't believe you sent him to bed without his dinner.
Mary: That's right.
Missy: On spaghetti and hot dog night. That's rough.

Sheldon: Where's Dad?
Mary: He went to Oklahoma for that job interview.
Missy: I thought you put your foot down on that one.
Mary: Just keep eating your breakfast.

Sheldon: How does the future not concern you?
Missy: I guess there's stuff I'm looking forward to.
Sheldon: Like what?
Missy: Going on dates?
Sheldon: Boring.
Missy: Driving.
Sheldon: Scary.
Missy: Getting married. Hopefully to Vanilla Ice.
Sheldon: You want to marry a snow cone?

Missy: What's with the maps?
Sheldon: I'm going with Dr. Sturgis and Dr. Linkletter to a radio telescope in the Davis Mountains.
Missy: [sighs] Of course you are.
George Sr.: Problem?
Missy: Nope. He gets to do whatever he wants, and I'm not even allowed to go the beach with my friends.
George Sr.: It's just a school trip.
Missy: It's fine.

Sheldon: I need Mom to sing "Soft Kitty".
Missy: Don't do it.
Sheldon: Why?
Missy: You're being a baby again.
Sheldon: But I'm injured.
Missy: Big deal. You broke your arm. Look at Stephen Hawking over there. He's in a wheelchair. You don't hear him whining about it with his robot voice.
Sheldon: So you're saying he and I are brilliant minds who have both suffered great physical adversity.
Missy: That's not even close to what I'm saying.

Sheldon: I didn't realize we were expected to take sides.
Mary: No one needs to take sides.
Missy: When Heather M. 's parents got divorced, she said it was like picking sides, but you get twice the presents.
Mary: This isn't a divorce.
Sheldon: And I'm sure Meemaw and Dr. Sturgis will still be friends.
Missy: Heather M.'s parents aren't friends. But now she's got Barbie's DreamHouse and the pink Corvette. You heard me.

Mary: Why aren't you in school?
Missy: You told me not to punch anyone else, so I left.
Mary: Well... go to your room.

Paige: Hey, Mom, can Missy and I go to the Hello Kitty store?
Linda: Well, it's okay with me if it's okay with Mary.
Mary: It's okay, but you better be on your best behavior.
Missy: I will, I promise.
Mary: Go ahead.
Missy: Boy, you steal one pencil sharpener and you never hear the end of it.

Mary: Shelly, why aren't you asleep?
Sheldon: I'm studying for Sunday school.
Mary: You're reading the Bible? That's wonderful.
Sheldon: I do have a question.
Mary: Sure, what?
Sheldon: Is there anyone in our town from the Amalek tribe?
Mary: I don't know, why?
Sheldon: If there is, we're supposed to kill them and their cows.
Mary: Well, no. There's no Amaleks.
Missy: Told you.

Mary: "Nice people."
George Sr.: Then why did we leave him there?!
Mary: Because we love him and we want the best for him.
Missy: This is tense.

Mary: I was gonna give this to you at the end of the season party, but I was so excited that I wanted you to see it now. Mm.
Missy: What the hell is that?
Mary: I couldn't find any girl baseball trophies, so I made you one.
Missy: Why is her head so big?
Mary: It's a Barbie head. I had to improvise.
Missy: You chopped the head off one of my Barbies?
Mary: Don't be silly. I bought a new one.
Missy: I could've had a new Barbie?

Missy: Look at these rain boots. They have ducks on them. And the ducks are wearing boots.
Paige: Those are so cute.

Paige: Okay, pick a number.
Missy: Three.
Paige: One, two, three. Now pick a color.
Missy: Pink, duh.
Paige: The name of your future pony is Sparkle Sunshine.
Missy: I would totally name it that!

Missy: But if you did get a divorce, how many American Girl dolls could I get?
Mary: Your father and I aren't getting a divorce.
Missy: But more than one, right?