‘One Bad Night and Chaos of Selfish Desires’ Quotes Page 1 of 3    

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: Missy and I broke a lot of rules the other night, and we've received no punishment.
George: [sighs] Buddy, it's been a rough week. We're just glad you're both safe.
Sheldon: But in the absence of a divine being, society's rules are what keeps a person's morality in check.
George: Well, there you go.
Sheldon: No, y-you're not following me. If actions have no repercussions, society breaks down, everything devolves into chaos.
George: You might be overthinking this.
Sheldon: I thought so, too. Then I thought about it, and I'm not.
George: Sheldon, you had one bad night. Just let it go.
Sheldon: But... I did something wrong and I got away with it. That's not okay.
George: Buddy...
Sheldon: Socrates maintained that the man who lies to himself has an enemy living within. He's not even a person. He's just a chaos of selfish desires wrapped in an animal hide.

Quote from Sheldon

Meemaw: Hey. Good news. Your dad's doing okay and should be home in a couple of days.
Missy: Thank God.
Sheldon: Thank modern medicine.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: I'm having a moral quandary, and I could really use your help.
Meemaw: Oh, moral quandaries. I hate those. Shoot.
Sheldon: You're the least moral person I know... How do you live with yourself?
Meemaw: I'm about to shut this door in your face.
Sheldon: See? Other people would be kind to a child in need. That's why I came to you.
Meemaw: Okay, fine. What do you want?
Sheldon: I'm confused as to how to go about my business after misbehaving and not being punished.
Meemaw: And where do I come in?
Sheldon: You tell lies, you gamble, you have quite the potty mouth, and yet you never seem to pay a price for any of it.
Meemaw: Well, when you're cute like me, rules are just a little different.
Sheldon: Hmm. That would also explain the endless parade of romantic partners. [Meemaw slams the door] Are you leaving because you have a man in there?
Meemaw: No!
Sheldon: Hmm. Although she would lie about it, so who knows?

Quote from Dr. John Sturgis

Dr. John Sturgis: So, what brings you here?
Sheldon: Well, I did something wrong, and yet I've received no punishment. What's my incentive to behave morally if the rules of society aren't being enforced?
Dr. John Sturgis: Reminds me of the Ring of Gyges.
Sheldon: I'm not familiar with the Ring of Gyges.
Dr. John Sturgis: Oh, it's a delightful brainteaser. Plato asked the question: If you could wear a ring that made you invisible, what would prevent you from committing the most horrendous crimes?
Sheldon: Sounds an awful lot like the Ring of Sauron in The Lord of the Rings.
Dr. John Sturgis: Oh. I'm not familiar with The Lord of the Rings.
Sheldon: Oh, it's a delightful series of fantasy books in which there's a ring that makes the wearer invisible but also leads to moral corruption.
Dr. John Sturgis: Ooh. Perhaps you should read Plato, and I should read The Lord of the Rings.
Sheldon: You should really start with The Hobbit.
Dr. John Sturgis: What's a hobbit?
Sheldon: It's a race of short humanoids who live in burrows and have hairy feet.
Dr. John Sturgis: Oh. I've been called that. But I never knew what it was.

Quote from George Jr.

Georgie: Ooh. I'm in time for dinner. Good. 'Cause I have worked up an appetite.

Quote from Dr. John Sturgis

Sheldon: I still don't understand why you'd rather work here than be a physicist.
Dr. John Sturgis: I'm enjoying the change of pace. And they let me take home all the expired food I want.

Quote from Sheldon

Missy: How am I supposed to compete with a seventh grader? Mom won't even let me shave my legs.
Sheldon: Can we please go home?
Missy: You can. I'm not.
Sheldon: As we've established, woods: very scary, me: very scared.
Missy: Then I guess you're here until the sun comes up.
Sheldon: So I'll be able to see what kill me? Pass. Can you at least go back to complaining about boys so I can get some sleep?
Missy: We licked the same Ring Pop once. It's like it meant nothing.

Quote from Meemaw

Meemaw: Less monkey, more Clint. There we go.

Quote from George Jr.

Jana: You sure your boss isn't gonna show up?
Georgie: Yeah, but not positive. So let's keep this train on the tracks. [pager beeps]
Jana: Aren't you gonna check that?
Georgie: Nope.
Jana: But what if it's an emergency?
Georgie: It's not. I'm turning this off. [looks at pager] Dadgummit!

Quote from George Jr.

Georgie: [on the phone] Well, is he gonna be okay?
Meemaw: You know as much as I do. Now help me find the kids.
Georgie: I'm on it. I have an idea where they went.
Meemaw: Great. And where are you, by the way?
Georgie: Uh, at work.
Meemaw: This time of night? Why?
Georgie: Got to find the kids. [hangs up]

Quote from Sheldon

Meemaw: Hmm, all right, you two try and get some sleep, okay?
Missy: Meemaw? Do you think I gave Dad a heart attack?
Meemaw: What? No. This isn't your fault.
Missy: I was really mean to him.
Sheldon: I was mean to him as well.
Missy: What I did was so much worse.
Sheldon: That is true. When we're receiving our punishment, they should really let you have it.
Meemaw: Okay, y'all go to sleep.
Sheldon: But I was just an accomplice. It wouldn't be fair if we got equal punishment.
Meemaw: Sleep.

Quote from Sheldon

Adult Sheldon: My meemaw didn't understand. When I was feeling anxious, it was rules and structure that I found soothing... Not to mention the relaxing melody of the Star Trek theme song.
Sheldon: [humming Star Trek theme]
Meemaw: Stop that.
Sheldon: As soon as I'm soothed. [resumes humming Star Trek theme]

Quote from George Sr.

Adult Sheldon: With my father home from the hospital, my mother had instructed us to let him relax. And what could be more relaxing than a spirited discussion of societal rules and morality?
Sheldon: Dad.
George: What's up?
Sheldon: I'm struggling with an ethical crisis.
George: Be a kid. Quit struggling.

Quote from Pastor Jeff

Pastor Jeff: Just wanted to bring by some get-well cards from the kids at Sunday school.
George: Well, isn't that sweet.
Pastor Jeff: Some interesting spellings of the name "George." My favorites are "Gorge" and "Garage." [chuckles]
George: Well, you tell the kids that Coach Gorge appreciates it.
Pastor Jeff: Will do.

Quote from Pastor Jeff

George: You want to sit?
Pastor Jeff: I'm not gonna stay long. I just want to pray over you a little and let you get some rest.
George: Oh. Okay, yeah, sure.
Pastor Jeff: Lord, I thank you for George Cooper and pray that you heal him from the inside out. This is a good man, a family man, a devoted father and a faithful husband. Bless him and everything he does. Amen.
Mary: Heck yes, amen!

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