‘A God-Fearin' Baptist and a Hot Trophy Husband’ Quotes Page 1 of 3
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519. A God-Fearin' Baptist and a Hot Trophy Husband
April 21, 2022After Georgie tells his parents that he has gotten a girl pregnant, George and Mary invite Mandy to dinner. Meanwhile, Sheldon and Missy sense that there is family drama going on that they are not being told about.
Quote from George Jr.
Georgie: Okay, in my defense...
Meemaw: You have no defense. You're an idiot.
Georgie: That was a big part of my defense.
Quote from Billy Sparks
Billy Sparks: You like meatloaf?
Missy: Yeah, is that what we're having?
Billy Sparks: No, just making dinner conversation.
Quote from Mary
Mary: When do we get to sit down with her and talk this through?
Georgie: Ah, yeah, here's the thing about that: she ain't real eager to meet y'all.
Mary: Why not?
Meemaw: Did you want to meet George's parents when he knocked you up?
Mary: I was not "knocked up," I was with child. And he's right there. [Georgie waves to Meemaw]
Quote from Mary
George: You ever stop to think maybe she doesn't want to marry a 17-year-old?
Mary: He'll be 18 in March.
George: All right, you're just being ridiculous. [goes back inside]
Mary: I'm being a Christian.
[After Mary walks over and knocks on the garage door, a dozy Georgie opens it]
Mary: When you were born, you were a gift from God but that does not change the fact that I am very mad at you!
Georgie: All right. [closes door]
Quote from George Jr.
Mary: Maybe it would be better if you went to your parents with, um, good news first.
Mandy: And what would that be?
Mary: Well... everybody loves a wedding.
George: Would you stop with that?
Mary: It needs to be discussed.
Mandy: No, it doesn't. I'm having a baby, I don't need to marry another one.
Georgie: I know I'm young now, but think about it... When you're a dried-up old lady, I'll be your hot trophy husband.
Meemaw: Maybe her dad should put you down.
Quote from George Sr.
George: Oh, no.
Georgie: I messed up.
George: Oh, no.
Georgie: What do I do?
George: Oh, no.
Georgie: Please, say anything else.
George: I'm trying! Okay... Are you sure she's pregnant?
Georgie: Yes, she took a test.
George: Sometimes those things are wrong.
Georgie: She took more than one.
George: Well... Are you sure it's yours? Some gals like to get around.
Georgie: Dad, she's pregnant, it's mine and she's having it.
George: Y'all are too young to have a baby!
Georgie: I am. She's actually 29.
George: Oh, no.
Quote from George Jr.
Mary: What's going on? Everything okay?
George: You might want to sit.
Mary: Now you're scaring me.
George: No one died.
Georgie: Kind of the opposite, actually. [George rolls his eyes]
Quote from George Sr.
Georgie: What's wrong with me?
George: You're an idiot. You're irresponsible. You live in a garage and use a sink as a toilet! Care to jump in?
Quote from Meemaw
Meemaw: You look like crap.
Mary: Thanks.
Meemaw: You go out drinking last night?
Mary: Of course not.
Meemaw: 'Cause when I look that bad, I been out drinkin'.
Quote from Sheldon
Sheldon: Mom, have you seen my Thursday socks? I looked in my drawer and I could only find Wednesday and Friday.
Mary: Thursday's are in the dryer.
Sheldon: Mm. [opens dryer] Oh. Here's the little rascals.
Quote from Mary
Meemaw: You were saying?
Mary: I was just thinking about when I was pregnant with Georgie, and... how hard that must've been for you. I'm sorry.
Meemaw: Georgie got that girl pregnant?!
Mary: Keep your voice down. And... yes.
Meemaw: Oh...
Quote from Sheldon
Sheldon: What do you think is going on?
Missy: I don't know, but I'm telling you, it's bad.
Sheldon: Not necessarily. Maybe they're planning a surprise party for us.
Missy: Our birthday isn't for months.
Sheldon: True. Maybe they needed some lead time. You can't expect Stephen Hawking to roll in at a moment's notice.
Quote from Sheldon
George: Come on, I'm taking you both to school. Let's move it. [exits]
Missy: He looks terrible.
Sheldon: He has had heart problems, plus he's been having a rough time at work.
Missy: Not to mention he's pretty chunky.
Sheldon: Oh, dear. I wonder if RadioShack makes a defibrillator.
Quote from George Sr.
George: [scoffs] I don't see why I got to wear a tie.
Mary: Because we want to make a good impression.
George: She already met this bozo, aren't we past that?
Quote from George Jr.
Georgie: Hey, let's just keep in mind, I didn't do this by myself. It takes two to tango.
Meemaw: Do you even know what a tango is?
Georgie: It's sex, ain't it?