Sheldon: Oh, I'm assuming you heard the bad news.
Mary: What news?
Sheldon: Isaac Asimov died.
Mary: Oh, no, is that one of your school friends?
Sheldon: What? No, he's one of the most prolific science fiction writers in the history of the genre.
George: Never heard of him.
Sheldon: Sure you have. He wrote I, Robot, the Foundation trilogy.
George: Nope.
Sheldon: Nightfall? The Posotronic Man?
George: You ever heard of this guy?
Mary: Mm-mm.
Sheldon: Caves of Steel. Hostess. The Naked Sun?
George: Whoever he is, sorry he died. Gotta go. Bye.
Mary: Bye.
Adult Sheldon: Astonishing. Asimov wrote almost 500 books, which was apparently 500 more than my family had read.

Dr. Linkletter: [on answer phone] Connie, Grant Linkletter. Wonderful seeing you tonight.
Meemaw: Yeah, yeah.
Dr. Linkletter: Hope you enjoyed our little book club. If you'd ever like to discuss it further, I know the perfect Italian café. The cannolis are resplendent.
Meemaw: Resplendent! [chuckles] [machine beeps]
Dr. John Sturgis: [on answer phone] Connie! John Sturgis here.
Meemaw: What a surprise.
Dr. John Sturgis: It was so nice to have you at our book club. When it comes to science fiction, those things can be real sausage parties. Anyhoo, if you're free next week, I was wondering if you'd like to... [Meemaw skips to the next message]
Dr. Linkletter: Grant Linkletter again. If you don't like Italian, I also know a sublime Vietnamese spot. Have you ever tried Bún Boò Hue? [machine beeps]
Dr. John Sturgis: I don't know why I said "sausage party." There was probably a better way to phrase that. [machine beeps]
Dr. Linkletter: Connie, Grant Linkletter...

Georgie: [answers phone] Hello?
Dale: Hi, it's Dale. Listen, you gotta tell your dad.
Georgie: Well, I will, eventually.
Dale: Well, if you don't, I'm gonna.
Georgie: I just need more time to figure things out.
Dale: Well, your dad's sniffing around here, he's asking a lot of questions.
Georgie: What kind of questions?
Dale: Like why are you talking to me instead of him?
Georgie: Why does he care?
Dale: His feelings are hurt.
Georgie: That's weird.
Dale: I know. 'Cause talking to you ain't great.
George: [opens door] Can I get a hand with something?
Dale: Yeah. [on the phone] Oh, gotta go. I love you, Mom. Bye-bye. [hangs up]
George: Your mom's still alive?
Dale: Huh?

Georgie: Can I talk to you about something?
Dale: Come on, this is my coffee time.
Georgie: It's more important than your coffee.
Dale: If I don't drink my coffee, I don't go to the bathroom. That's important.
Georgie: That girl I was seeing is pregnant.
Dale: You win. Sit.

Dr. Linkletter: How rude of me, Connie. Can I offer you a beverage? Soda, water, Snapple?
Meemaw: I'm fine.
Dr. John Sturgis: I'd take a Snapple.
Dr. Linkletter: You know where the fridge is.

Sheldon: Can we get back to the book?
Dr. John Sturgis: Yes, Connie, I'd love to hear more of your thoughts on it.
Meemaw: I think I've said my piece.
Sheldon: I have some thoughts.
Dr. Linkletter: And we'll get to those in due time. Don't you think Asimov did a remarkable job of capturing the poetic terror of the coming darkness?
Meemaw: I'm not sure I got that.
Dr. Linkletter: Oh, listen to this. "Dusk, like a palpable entity, entered the room, and the dancing circle of yellow lights about the torches etched itself into ever-sharper distinction against the gathering grayness beyond." [Meemaw and John are silent]
Sheldon: Powerful.
Dr. Linkletter: Wasn't it?
[Meemaw shrugs her shoulders]

Missy: [on the phone] Pastor Jeff, this is Missy Cooper.
Pastor Jeff: Hey there, Missy. What can I do for you?
Missy: This is about what I can do for you.
Pastor Jeff: Okay.
Missy: How would you and your wife like a night away from the baby? Maybe a movie? I hear Beethoven's funny. It's about a big dumb dog.
Pastor Jeff: Are you offering to babysit?
Missy: Yes, I am.
Pastor Jeff: 'Cause I asked your mom about it a while back, and she said you weren't interested.
Missy: Oh, really? Well, she's wrong.
Pastor Jeff: Fantastic. How's Friday at 6:00?
Missy: Perfect.
Pastor Jeff: See you then. What was the name of that dog movie again?
Missy: Beethoven. And it's PG, so God's cool with it.

Mary: What time are you home tonight?
George: Late. I'm working at Ballard's after practice again.
Mary: How long can you keep this up?
George: Uh, maybe I'll get fired from the high school and only have one job to worry about.
Mandy: I'm sorry.
George: Me, too.

Georgie: My folks are gonna kill me.
Dale: They don't know yet?
Georgie: You're the only person I told.
Dale: Oh, no, I don't want that.
Georgie: Please help me.
Dale: [sighs] All right, first things first. Are you sure this kid's even yours?
Georgie: Yeah. We've been sleeping together.
Dale: Well, that doesn't mean it's yours.
Georgie: [cheerfully] Maybe she cheated on me.
Dale: We can only hope.

Sheldon: How are you holding up?
Meemaw: With what?
Sheldon: The death of Isaac Asimov.
Meemaw: Who?
Sheldon: Pop Pop's favorite science fiction writer, remember?
Meemaw: [chuckles] At this rate, you're lucky I remember Pop Pop.
Sheldon: Well, he gave me Asimov's Foundation trilogy for my fifth birthday.
Meemaw: I remember he used to try to get me to read that stuff. Boring!
Sheldon: Boring? Asimov invented the laws of robotics and the concept of a galactic empire.
Meemaw: If a book doesn't have a shirtless guy with long hair on the cover, I ain't reading it.
Sheldon: You're missing out.
Meemaw: I'm really not.

Meemaw: You haven't said a thing about my new car.
Sheldon: Oh. I hate it.

Sheldon: Have you read The Gods Themselves?
Dr. Linkletter: "We cannot stop Estwald."
Both: "We are Estwald!"
Dr. John Sturgis: Who's Estwald?
Sheldon: You don't know him either?
Dr. John Sturgis: I know who Asimov is, but I've never read his work.
Dr. Linkletter: Talk about big boy science. The man coined the term "robotics."
Dr. John Sturgis: Ooh.
Sheldon: Maybe we could have a book club.
Dr. John Sturgis: My social schedule is astonishingly open.
Dr. Linkletter: What a lovely way to honor Asimov's life.
Sheldon: It'll be like my mom's Bible study, but we know the characters aren't real.
Dr. Linkletter: What book should we start with?
Dr. John Sturgis: That naked one sounded good.

Georgie: All right. I know what I need to do.
Dale: Tell your parents?
Georgie: Do the right thing and marry her.
Dale: Whoa. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Georgie... no one has to get married here.
Georgie: Well, my dad got my mom pregnant, and he married her.
Dale: Rushing into marriage with someone you hardly know is a bad idea.
Georgie: Maybe we could be happy together.
Dale: How does she feel about you right now?
Georgie: Pissed. But she's pregnant, so it's probably just chick hormones.
Dale: Well, tell her that and see what happens.

George: Hey, what are you doing here?
Georgie: I just had to talk to Dale.
George: You all right? You look like you saw a ghost.
Georgie: Yeah, I'm good.
George: Look, I know I've been busy, but if you ever want to talk, I'm around.
Georgie: Actually, uh... I-I... I got a... I got a girl pregnant.
George: What the hell's the matter with you?!
[George picks up Dale's cash register and smashes it through a glass display case, before tearing his own shirt off]
[reality:]
George: Hello? I said if you ever want to talk, I'm here.
Georgie: Thanks. Gotta go.

Sheldon: Guess what. Dr. Sturgis, Dr. Linkletter and I are starting an Isaac Asimov book club.
Meemaw: That's nice.
Sheldon: I'm glad you think so because you should join.
Meemaw: And I think... no.
Sheldon: But this is perfect for you.
Meemaw: Why?
Sheldon: Because three smart people will be there to explain things that go over your head.
Meemaw: I'm gonna bonk you over your head in a minute.