George: He also told us how much it costs, and it's more than we can handle.
Sheldon: I'll pay you back. I'm sure I'll make plenty as a theoretical physicist.
Mary: I'm sure you will, but right now, we don't have the money.
Sheldon: Have you considered scrimping and saving? I... Do we really need breakfast, lunch and dinner?
George: Sheldon, you do our taxes.
Sheldon: And I'm about to start charging for that.
Mary: Shelly, I'm sorry, but it's no.
Sheldon: Ach!

Sheldon: This set was actually endorsed by Professor Proton.
Andy: Who's Professor Proton?
Sheldon: Who's Professor Proton? How much time do you have? Arthur Jeffries, aka Professor Proton, brought science to the masses on his revolutionary television show Professor Proton. Actually, this set is not for sale.

Sheldon: If you're going to the grocery store, you should get more tinfoil.
George: [sighs] You're not making a hat, are you?
Sheldon: No. I need it to black out my windows. It's 10:00 p.m. in Heidelberg. Gute Nacht.
George: [exhales] Tinfoil.

Sheldon: I've been reading up on German history and I've realized that appeasement in the face of rule-breaking is a slippery slope. Let's say that sneaking out was your "occupying the Sudetenland". What's your "invasion of Poland" going to be?
Tonya: I see it.
Missy: [scoffs] What are you talking about?

Mary: And please look after Sheldon and I as we travel to Germany.
Sheldon: "Sheldon and me".
Mary: [sighs] God doesn't care about grammar.
Sheldon: You're not gonna be on a ten-hour flight with God.
Georgie: I bet it's gonna feel longer than ten.

Sheldon: When we get there, you'll be looking for "international departures".
George: Ah, well, thanks for letting me know that Germany's in a different country.
Sheldon: Is he joking? I'd like to believe he's joking.
Mary: He's joking, Sheldon.
Sheldon: He's a football coach. I don't know what he knows.

Mary: Don't bother them, they're busy.
Sheldon: They're flight attendants, I'm on a flight and I need attending. [Mary scoffs]
Sue: Can I help you?
Sheldon: Yes, when is the seatbelt sign going to turn off?
Sue: As soon as the captain thinks it's safe to move about the cabin.
Sheldon: But you're moving about the cabin.
Sue: Because you pushed the button.
Mary: We're sorry to bother you.
Sue: Is there anything else?
Sheldon: Yes, would you please tell the man in 44E that I'm a huge fan of his mirror symmetry theory? And he also may want to consider applying it to enumerative geometry.
Mary: There's nothing else.

Sheldon: Oh, um...
Mei-Tung: Come on, I just gave you a hint.
Sheldon: We solve for the geodesics.
Mei-Tung: Wrong. [slaps Sheldon's hand with her pencil]
Sheldon: Ow! Why'd you hit me?
Mei-Tung: Pain is the best teacher. [Mary smiles]
Sheldon: You're a very impressive little girl, but there's a saying. At some point, it's not enough to be a dog who plays the piano. You have to play the piano well.
Mei-Tung: I play extremely well. I'm a concert pianist.
Sheldon: Of course you are. [Mary chuckles] What?
Mary: Sorry, just a funny part of the Bible.

Mei-Tung: You didn't account for all the dimensions.
Sheldon: The Calabi-Yau manifold has six dimensions.
Mei-Tung: Only if there's fermions. Without fermions, there could be up to 26 dimensions.
Sheldon: What? Dr. Linkletter and Dr. Sturgis never mentioned 26 dimensions.
Mei-Tung: Who are they?
Sheldon: They're my teachers, and they're really smart.
Mei-Tung: I've never heard of them.
Sheldon: Well, I've probably never heard of your teachers.
Mei-Tung: I recently studied with Henry W. Kendall.
Sheldon: The Nobel Prize winner for his pioneering research on the deep inelastic scattering of electrons on protons and bound neutrons?
Mei-Tung: Yes.
Sheldon: Never heard of him.

George: [phone ringing] Sheldon, phone.
Sheldon: [to himself] 187 IQ and I'm a receptionist. [answers phone] Cooper residence. Hello, Mr.
Ballard. He's here. May I tell him what this is concerning? I may not? Very well. Dad, it's Mr. Ballard.
George: I'll pick it up in here.
Sheldon: [quietly] Which you could've done to begin with.

Sheldon: So, if I'm to understand correctly, our meemaw's been running a criminal enterprise.
Missy: Cool, huh?
Sheldon: No, it is most certainly not cool. On the one hand, people need to pay for their crimes. On the other, if Meemaw's in prison, who's gonna smell like Bengay and kiss me on the head?
Missy: She's an old lady, they're not gonna lock her up forever.
Sheldon: I sure hope not.

George: All right, what do you got?
Sheldon: Well, have you ever heard of Vincent "The Chin" Gigante?
George: He a boxer?
Sheldon: He was originally. Good for you. But he's better known as a major crime boss who managed to stay out of prison by employing the legal doctrine of "mens rea".
George: Which is?
Sheldon: He pretended to be nuts. He wandered the streets of New York in a bathrobe, he had poor personal hygiene, he mumbled to himself... all the cuckoo classics.
George: Yeah. If you need someone to testify that she's off her rocker, you give me a call.
Sheldon: Thank you.

Meemaw: What do you got?
Sheldon: It's simple. We argue under Article 46-B of the Texas Penal Code that you're unfit to stand trial due to mental incompetence.
Meemaw: You-you want to tell 'em I'm crazy?
Sheldon: Yes. And keep this look. It really bolsters our case.

Sheldon: It's refreshing to talk to people who appreciate my work.
Dr. John Sturgis: Appreciate it, understand it, and are inspired by it.
Dr. Linkletter: Ditto, ditto and ditto.
Dr. John Sturgis: And I'm sure your family is very proud.
Sheldon: Yes, but not just me. Childish maps, impregnating a woman out of wedlock... they're proud of all their kids.
[Dr. Sturgis and Dr. Linkletter stare blankly at Sheldon]

Sheldon: That doesn't go there.
Missy: Doesn't matter.
Sheldon: Canned beans next to jarred preserves?
Missy: Who cares?
Sheldon: I care.
Missy: Well, no one cares that you care.
Sheldon: I'm someone. And I care that I care. And I care that I care that I care.