Meemaw: [on the phone] So you want me to help you teach an old dog new tricks?
Sheldon: I feel like if I said that you would have hung up.
Meemaw: Look, it can't be easy for them to be taught by somebody your age. I think you're just gonna have to be a little understanding and patient.
Sheldon: Patient? They could drop dead at any mome... [Meemaw hangs up]
Meemaw: [answers phone] What?
Sheldon: Despite this challenging exchange, you know I love you.
Meemaw: Yeah, yeah.

Adult Sheldon: My meemaw made me realize that Dr. Linkletter and Dr. Sturgis' failure to learn string theory was my failure as a teacher. Perhaps the knuckles that really needed to be rapped were my own.
Sheldon: Ow! Lesson learned. [knock at door]
Dr. John Sturgis: Sheldon, we'd like you to teach us again.
Meemaw: [v.o.] Understanding and patience.
♪ Everybody hurts... ♪
Sheldon: All right, dummkopfs, let's do this.
♪ Sometimes ♪

Sheldon: Do you know any comic book stores in Pasadena? I'm worried I'm not gonna find any as good as this one.
Nathan: I like to think a comic book store is only as good as the people who hang out in it.
Sheldon: Do you like the people who hang out in this one?
Nathan: No.
Sheldon: Mm. I also need to stock up on some more T-shirts while I'm here.
Nathan: Yeah, sure. I mean, you want to look bitchin'. It's another thing they say in SoCal.
Sheldon: I won't be saying that.
Nathan: Well, guess I'll see you around.
Sheldon: You probably won't.
Nathan: Okay.
Adult Sheldon: And I never saw him again.

Mary: Since everyone is here, there's something we want to talk to y'all about.
Missy: Oh, no, what's wrong now?
George: It isn't always bad news.
Sheldon: Last time we had a family meeting it was because Georgie got a girl pregnant out of wedlock.
Meemaw: Which was great news.
Mandy: Eventually.

Mary: Can we talk?
Sheldon: About you not moving?
George: Sheldon. You know how excited you are to go to Caltech? That's how I feel about going to Houston.
Sheldon: But when I was going to Caltech, I still had this home to come back to.
Mary: You'll still have a room wherever we end up.
Sheldon: But it won't be my room. This is my room.
Mary: How about this... we will take all your things with us and we'll set up your new room exactly the same.
Sheldon: So, your plan is to gaslight me?
George: [sighs] I know this is a lot of change, but sometimes change can be good.
Sheldon: Tell that to the woolly mammoth. You can't, because they went extinct.

Sheldon: So, how have you been?
Tam: Good. I actually have a girlfriend now and...
Sheldon: Oh, I've had a pretty rough time of it lately. I'm about to go away to Caltech and my parents decided to sell our home and move to Houston. I mean, that house has my room in it.
Tam: Well...
Sheldon: So now some stranger's gonna move in and turn it into a den, or worse... a nursery with a mural of Winnie the Pooh on the wall.
Tam: I think I might ask her to marry me.
Sheldon: Feynman and Einstein have been on those walls for five years, and now it's gonna be Tigger bouncing hither and thither?
Tam: Are you at all interested in my life?
Sheldon: No, but thank you for asking.

Sheldon: It's completely logical. You don't have your own house and you always complain about living with Mr. Ballard.
Dale: Wait a minute. You complaining to him about me?
Meemaw: No. I complain about you near him.
Sheldon: I have excellent hearing.
Meemaw: It doesn't matter.

Sheldon: Honestly, I can't think of a better starter home for a new family such as the one you've accidentally created.
Mandy: Do you think we'd be living with my parents if we could afford our own house?
Sheldon: Well, the history of banking in this country is rife with ill-advised loans made to poor people. You could be their next mistake.
Georgie: CeeCee would have her own room and we'd have an extra bedroom for whatever we want.
Sheldon: Actually, I'd like my room to stay as is, but when you accidentally have more kids, we can talk.
Georgie: It's happened once bef...
Mandy: No.
Georgie: Okay.

Sheldon: But if my parents sell it, I have no reason to come back.
President Hagemeyer: Sheldon, is it possible that what you're upset about is going away to California?
Sheldon: No, I'm excited about that.
President Hagemeyer: Well, things can be exciting and scary at the same time.
Sheldon: True. Once, on a dare, I ate a Sour Patch Kid. I thought I was gonna die. You would not believe the puckering. But now it makes a terrific story.
President Hagemeyer: Oh, riveting.

Missy: Well, I'm sure you'll make lots of friends. Maybe even a smart, weird girlfriend.
Sheldon: I have a girlfriend. Her name is science.
Missy: Cool. When do you leave?