George: Sheldon, do you really have to do that here?
Sheldon: If the management didn't want me to solve unified field theory, why would they give me a crayon?
Georgie: I told you to crack a window and leave him in the car.

Ms. MacElroy: "The man who lived in the town was tall." Which word is the relative pronoun? Sheldon.
Sheldon: Have you read The Lord of the Rings?
Ms. MacElroy: Um, I have, but that's not what we're really doing right now.
Sheldon: The relative pronoun is "who." Now, did you notice that in Fellowship, Elrond says that the foundations of Barad-dur were made with the One Ring?
Ms. MacElroy: Let's say sure.
Sheldon: However, in Appendix B, "The Tale of Years," it's clear that Sauron began building Barad-dur in Second Age 1000, 600 years before the ring was forged.
Ms. MacElroy: Georgie.
Georgie: Imagine living with this.
Ms. MacElroy: An hour a day is enough.

Missy: What?
Sheldon: Hey, it works. When I hit three Mississippis, she noticed.
George: See?
Georgie: Told you.

Georgie: I got another one. In The Shining, Jack Nicholson goes nuts and chases people around with an ax-
Meemaw: One question each.
Georgie: Dang it.

Georgie: How do relationships work for old people? When you were young, you didn't think old women looked hot. But now that you're old, do you?
Dr. John Sturgis: Well, that's a very interesting question.
Mary: Can I speak to you in the kitchen?
George: I want to hear the answer.
Dr. John Sturgis: I've always found your grandmother to be very hot stuff.
George: All right, let's go.
Georgie: But you can see her wrinkles, right?

Georgie: What time do I need to be there to set up?
Mary: Noon's fine.
George: What, you're helping out?
Georgie: Yeah.
George: Why?
Georgie: I want to support Mom. And God.
Missy: You're just doing it 'cause Veronica's gonna be there.
Georgie: And who made Veronica?

Georgie: [answering phone] Hello.
Lisa: Hi, Georgie. It's Lisa, from English class.
Georgie: Oh, hey. What's up?
Lisa: I was wondering if you could help me with our homework.
Georgie: Crap, we have homework?
Lisa: You're so funny.
Georgie: I think so. Most people don't.

Lisa: Hi, Georgie.
Georgie: Hey.
Lisa: I like that jacket.
Georgie: Then you'll probably like my pants; they're made of the same stuff.

Mary: Well, I don't think it's right that-
Georgie: [TV turns on] Sup.
Mary: Excuse me. Can't you see that your father and I are talking?
Georgie: Yeah, but you can talk anywhere, and this is the only room in the house with a TV.
George: Get out of here.
Georgie: Suit yourself. But I'd like to point out, if you'd let me buy a TV for my bedroom, we wouldn't be in this situation, now would we?

Georgie: Mom says you're sick.
Missy: [whispering] He's faking.
Georgie: Really? [closes door] Why? You love school.
Sheldon: Swim test.
Georgie: Oh, sure. You would die.

Georgie: They call it "Hot Dog on a Stick," but that's not the only food on a stick they sell.
Missy: It's not?
Georgie: They also got cheese on a stick.

Missy: There he is again.
Georgie: Why don't you go talk to him?
Missy: Are you crazy? Look how beautiful he is.
Georgie: Sorry, the only guy I'm calling beautiful is me. And maybe David Hasselhoff.

Georgie: Just say hi, keep it casual, pretend like you don't care that much.
Missy: But I care the most.
Georgie: See, that's gonna freak him out.
Missy: How do you know?
Georgie: 'Cause it's freaking me out. Now go. [later, shouting:] No touching! That's right, you heard me!

Georgie: [o.s.] It's actually a shampoo for ladies, but my hair just responds to it.

Jana: This is nice.
Georgie: I like to think of Chi-Chi's as a more romantic Taco Bell.