Popular Quotes

Quote from the episode Pilot

Mary: That's enough. Now, let's pray.
Sheldon: A moment please.
George Sr.: Hmm.
Mary: Leave him be.
George Sr.: He can hold hands with his family. It won't kill him.
Sheldon: We don't know that.

Quote from the episode A Therapist, a Comic Book, and a Breakfast Sausage

Meemaw: What's all this about choking?
George Jr.: Sheldon almost died this morning.
Meemaw: What?!
George Jr.: Oh, yeah. Dad was shaking him upside down like a ketchup bottle.
Missy: It was great.

Quote from the episode A Solar Calculator, a Game Ball, and a Cheerleader's Bosom

George Jr.: Fourth down.
George Sr.: Gotta punt.
Missy: Gotta.
Sheldon: Statistically, always punting on fourth down makes no sense.
George Jr.: Statistically, you're a dumbass.

Quote from the episode An Eagle Feather, a String Bean, and an Eskimo

Meemaw: You sure you're not jealous 'cause your little brother's moving up in the world?
George Jr.: Hey, I got plans of my own.
Meemaw: Do tell.
George Jr.: Soon as I graduate high school, I'm gonna be a professional male model.
Meemaw: That is hilarious.
George Jr.: What? I'm good-lookin'.
Meemaw: No, that you think you'll graduate high school.
Missy: The model thing was funny, too.

Quote from the episode A Solar Calculator, a Game Ball, and a Cheerleader's Bosom

Missy: What are you doing?
Sheldon: Trying to calculate the odds of the Dolphins covering the spread next Sunday.
Missy: I like dolphins. They talk out of that hole in their head.

Quote from the episode A Therapist, a Comic Book, and a Breakfast Sausage

Mary: Now, the thing you have to understand is Shelly is incredibly bright. I mean, his IQ is right up there with Albert Einstein and that English wheelchair fella.

Quote from the episode A Therapist, a Comic Book, and a Breakfast Sausage

George Sr.: And Sheldon's fine. You know what he's like. If someone took him, I'm sure they'll bring him right back.

Quote from the episode Pilot

Adult Sheldon: I've always loved trains. In fact, if my career in theoretical physics hadn't worked out, my backup plan was to become a professional ticket taker. Or hobo.

Quote from the episode Pilot

Sheldon: Good luck with your finger painting.
Missy: You're gonna get your ass kicked in high school.
Mary: (flicks Missy on the head) Hey!

Quote from the episode Pilot

Sheldon: Georgie, did you wash your hands before dinner? Or even this week?
George Jr.: None of your business.
Sheldon: Hence the mittens.