Dr. John Sturgis: Ooh, perhaps the cold dark matter we're looking for is not the axion but the majoron.
Sheldon: Uh-huh.
Dr. John Sturgis: That's it? I just laid down some big boy science.
Sheldon: Sorry. We lost a great man today, and no one seems to care.
Dr. Linkletter: Asimov?
Sheldon: Yes, Asimov.
Dr. Linkletter: I told three people the news, and you know what they said?
Sheldon: "Who's that?"
Dr. Linkletter: Exactly. What's wrong with the world? The man's a legend.
Sheldon: I didn't know you were a fan.
Dr. Linkletter: Ever since I read The Naked Sun. I'll admit, I came for the naked, but I stayed for the interplanetary conspiracies.

Sheldon: Dr. Linkletter, I need to talk to you.
Dr. Linkletter: Are we in my office?
Sheldon: No.
Dr. Linkletter: Then these are not my office hours.
Sheldon: Are you using my love of schedules against me?
Dr. Linkletter: [chuckles] Oh, yes.
Sheldon: Well done.

Sheldon: Dr. Linkletter, I need to talk to you.
Dr. Linkletter: Great.
Sheldon: Do you think you could get me access to the telescope room? I want to search for exoplanets that could support life.
Dr. Linkletter: Are you feeling homesick?
Sheldon: Are you implying that I'm from another planet?
Dr. Linkletter: Yes.
Sheldon: Compliment accepted.

Sheldon: Now, about the telescope room, I was watching Star Trek and it got me thinking...
Dr. Linkletter: Sheldon, searching for life on other planets isn't serious science. Leave that to the tinfoil hat brigade.
Sheldon: But statistically, given the number of stars and planets, it's likely we could find one capable of supporting life. And if we did, it would be the greatest scientific discovery of all time.
Dr. Linkletter: Yes, and if I had fruit on my head, I'd be Carmen Miranda.
Sheldon: I'm not familiar with that reference.
Dr. Linkletter: She sang and danced with fruit on her head.
Sheldon: Why would she have fruit on her head?
Dr. Linkletter: I don't know, in case she got hungry. It's not gonna happen, Sheldon!

Dr. Linkletter: I can't believe you'd use our book club to hit on Connie.
Dr. John Sturgis: And you didn't, Captain Cookies?
Dr. Linkletter: All right, if we're both gonna pursue her, let's lay down some ground rules.
Dr. John Sturgis: Fair enough.
Dr. Linkletter: And my ginger snaps are moist and delicious!
Dr. John Sturgis: Yeah, keep telling yourself that.

Sheldon: Oh, I'm assuming you heard the bad news.
Mary: What news?
Sheldon: Isaac Asimov died.
Mary: Oh, no, is that one of your school friends?
Sheldon: What? No, he's one of the most prolific science fiction writers in the history of the genre.
George: Never heard of him.
Sheldon: Sure you have. He wrote I, Robot, the Foundation trilogy.
George: Nope.
Sheldon: Nightfall? The Posotronic Man?
George: You ever heard of this guy?
Mary: Mm-mm.
Sheldon: Caves of Steel. Hostess. The Naked Sun?
George: Whoever he is, sorry he died. Gotta go. Bye.
Mary: Bye.
Adult Sheldon: Astonishing. Asimov wrote almost 500 books, which was apparently 500 more than my family had read.

Dr. Linkletter: [on answer phone] Connie, Grant Linkletter. Wonderful seeing you tonight.
Meemaw: Yeah, yeah.
Dr. Linkletter: Hope you enjoyed our little book club. If you'd ever like to discuss it further, I know the perfect Italian café. The cannolis are resplendent.
Meemaw: Resplendent! [chuckles] [machine beeps]
Dr. John Sturgis: [on answer phone] Connie! John Sturgis here.
Meemaw: What a surprise.
Dr. John Sturgis: It was so nice to have you at our book club. When it comes to science fiction, those things can be real sausage parties. Anyhoo, if you're free next week, I was wondering if you'd like to... [Meemaw skips to the next message]
Dr. Linkletter: Grant Linkletter again. If you don't like Italian, I also know a sublime Vietnamese spot. Have you ever tried Bún Boò Hue? [machine beeps]
Dr. John Sturgis: I don't know why I said "sausage party." There was probably a better way to phrase that. [machine beeps]
Dr. Linkletter: Connie, Grant Linkletter...