Meemaw: I can't believe you sent him to bed without his dinner.
Mary: That's right.
Missy: On spaghetti and hot dog night. That's rough.

Mary: Let's talk about something else. Georgie, how was your day?
George Jr.: My brother told the entire school we can't afford cable.
Mary: Oh, right. Missy?
Missy: Good, until I learned we can't afford cable.

Sheldon: I've been thinking, and there's something I'd like to say.
George Sr.: Unless it's an apology, I don't want to hear it.
Sheldon: I'm quitting science.
Missy: Not an apology. Spank him, Dad.

Missy: What's up?
Mary: None of your business.
Missy: Why is he crying?
Mary: Again, it's none of your business. Please go.
Missy: Fine. Celeste and I know when we aren't wanted.

Meemaw: So what do you think, George? Is it time to have "the talk" with him?
Missy: What talk?
Mary: No talk. Nobody's talking.
Sheldon: If "the talk" is in regards to human reproduction, I already understand how that works.
Mary: How do you know that?
Missy: I told him.
Mary: Oh, Lord.

Missy: Wait till you hear what I did to Meemaw.

Missy: Found 'em.
Sheldon: The tweezers?
Missy: Mom's needles and her magnifying glass.
Sheldon: Absolutely not.
Missy: Let me at least try.
Sheldon: No.
Missy: You're being a baby.
Sheldon: Nothing you can say will change my mind.
Missy: What if it gets infected and turns green and they have to cut it off?

Missy: Wait, she has tweezers in her makeup bag. She plucks her eyebrows with them. And sometimes her mustache.

Sheldon: [WHISPERING] Let's make this quick.
Missy: Why are you whispering?
Sheldon: That's how people speak when they're being naughty.
Missy: I wouldn't know. I'm naughty all the time.

Missy: We'll be okay on our own.
Sheldon: Yeah, we need to prove we can do this.
Meemaw: All right. I respect that. And I'm happy to keep this little incident a secret.
Missy: Really? I'm telling everyone. It was hilarious.

Missy: What's your homework?
Sheldon: Non-Euclidean geometry. How about you?
Missy: "Symonyms".
Sheldon: You mean synonyms?
Missy: I'm pretty sure she said "symonyms".

Mary: Okay, let's go over it one more time. House key's under the plastic owl by the front door. There's after-school snacks in the fridge. One for each of you. Emergency numbers are right there by the phone. First aid kit is in the hall closet. And you won't be needing it, but under the kitchen sink is a fire extinguisher.
Missy: Ooh, that looks fun.
Mary: For fires only, and don't be starting one just to use it.
Missy: It's like she can read my mind.

Mary: So, kids, we have a little family business to discuss.
Missy: You're pregnant?
Mary: No.
Missy: We're getting a puppy?
George Sr.: No.
Missy: I'm not sure I care.

George Sr.: Where you going?
Mary: I'm gonna give Sheldon a list of chores.
George Sr.: You're actually taking my advice?
Mary: Yes.
George Sr.: Well, how about that?
Mary: Hey, you were due.
Missy: Proud of you, George.

Missy: [after drawing on Sheldon's face mask] So pretty.

Sheldon: What's going on?
Missy: I'm not feeling so good. [COUGHS LOUDLY]
Sheldon: Biohazard! Biohazard! [Sheldon jumps out of bed, runs out of the room]
Missy: Sucker.

Mary: Missy! Turn off the computer. Time to go to bed.
Missy: I got to finish my homework! [playing Wheel of Fortune on the computer] Big money, big money. Yes!

Missy: Oh, Sugar Apple, I love you so much.
Sheldon: Your affection for inanimate objects frightens me.
Mary: I'm glad you're happy, Missy.
Missy: I'm even happier that I got a toy, and Sheldon got nothin'.

Mary: Well, now, we're not exactly done shopping. Sheldon, you still want that computer?
Sheldon: I thought we couldn't afford it.
Mary: Don't you worry about that. Do you want it or not?
Sheldon: More than anything.
Mary: All right, then, let's go get it.
Missy: Wait. He gets a computer and I get a lousy toy?
Mary: I thought you liked it.
Missy: Not anymore.

George Jr.: I'll get it! [answering the phone suavely] Hello, Georgie speaking.
Missy: Did you run to the phone? Do you feel stupid?