Adult Sheldon: Dr. Sturgis was a wise man. It was a learning opportunity. And when the day comes that I'm wrong, I fully plan to admit it.

George: I may not understand exactly what's going on with you and Dr. Sturgis, but you can't be rude to an adult.
Sheldon: What if they're wrong?
George: Doesn't matter. There are plenty of stupid people in the world, but when they're older than you, you got to show them respect.
Sheldon: I understand, sir. Thank you for your incredibly wise advice.
George: Okay.
Missy: Did you just call Dad stupid without calling him stupid?
Sheldon: Yes.

Ms. Hutchins: Sheldon, why aren't you in second period?
Sheldon: I'm working on this math problem.
Ms. Hutchins: I think you might be the first person in history who's ever cut class to do math.
Sheldon: The irony wasn't lost on me.

Georgie: What's a math emergency?
George: That's when things don't add up. Oh, come on, guys. That was a good one.

Meemaw: Well, if he's wrong, then teach him to be right instead of berating him like a big ol' jackass.
Dr. John Sturgis: That's very hurtful!
Meemaw: Well, how 'bout that? They do run slower.

Pastor Jeff: The Walker couple is coming in for counseling.
Mary: If you rescheduled, I'm sure they'd understand.
Pastor Jeff: Hey, what if you did it?
Mary: Marriage counseling? Don't you need some sort of training for that?
Pastor Jeff: Nah, you just listen, uh, give 'em a couple prayers, send 'em on their way.

Dr. John Sturgis: It's all right, Connie. Sheldon's trying to justify his shortcut.
Sheldon: Not a shortcut, a more elegant and efficient method to achieve the correct answer.
Dr. John Sturgis: Well, I applaud the effort, young man.
Sheldon: Don't treat me like a child, treat me like a colleague.
Dr. John Sturgis: Fine. This is the stupidest thing I've ever seen.
Sheldon: How could you say that?! [CRYING]
Meemaw: What are you doing?
Dr. John Sturgis: Treating him like a colleague.
Meemaw: Do you and your colleagues make each other run out of the room crying like that?
Dr. John Sturgis: Sometimes. But we run slower, 'cause we're old.

Mary: Morning, Peg. I need to run Sunday's bulletin by Pastor Jeff. Is he in?
[JEFF COUGHING]
Peg: Yep.
[COUGHING CONTINUES]
Mary: Is he coming down with somethin'?
Peg: Yep. [COUGHS]
Mary: Oh, my, are you sick, too?
Peg: [COUGHING] Never better.

Mary: Okay, if you really want me to.
Pastor Jeff: I do. In fact, for the rest of the day, you're in charge. All right? The bulletins, the palms, it's all you.
Mary: Well, all right, um, but only if you promise to go home and get some rest.
Pastor Jeff: Sure. Home, movie theater, food court, somewhere.

Mary: Anything you can tell me about the Walkers?
Peg: Not really, just a couple of newlyweds trying to figure it out.
Mary: Well, marriage is hard.
Peg: I'll never know.
Mary: Oh don't think that way. I'm sure there's someone out there for you.
Peg: Oh, no, that's not the problem. I just don't want to waste this on just one guy.

Dr. John Sturgis: I think I'm losing a step.
Meemaw: You're not alone. The other night I had bingo for five moves, didn't even know it.
Dr. John Sturgis: Were you drinking?
Meemaw: It's bingo, of course I was drinking. Don't worry about it. We'll lose a step together.

Adult Sheldon: It should come as no surprise that the very first grade I ever received was a "super-duper." Granted it was for counting spots on a ladybug, but still, I nailed it. Even as the difficulty of assignments grew, I maintained the same level of excellence. In every class, in every subject, I was perfect. Which is why this day hit me like a ton of bricks.

Meemaw: Hey, moonpie. Ready to go?
Sheldon: Look at this.
Meemaw: 95? That's terrific.
Sheldon: No. If it was terrific, it would say 100 with the word "terrific" next to it.
Meemaw: Don't sweat it, you'll get 100 next time.
Sheldon: But I should have gotten it this time. Dr. Sturgis made a mistake.
Meemaw: And we're sweatin' it.

Meemaw: You like Willie Nelson?
Sheldon: That would require knowing the permeability of free space and natural units.
Meemaw: [MUSIC VOLUME INCREASES] I suppose I like Willie Nelson.

Ms. Ingram: Today we're gonna work on interior angles of a convex polygon. Georgie, where's your brother?
Georgie: I don't know, do you really want him here?
Ms. Ingram: Convex polygons are polygons...