George Sr.: I mean, I-I just can't win. When I step in, I'm doing it wrong, and when I don't step in, she yells at me.
Coach Wilkins: I hear you.
George Sr.: So Darlene does the same thing with you?
Coach Wilkins: No. But I'd hate it if she did. That sounds awful.
George Sr.: So, what do you two fight about?
Coach Wilkins: You know, normal stuff. Who loves the other one more. Whose turn it is for a foot rub. Oh, the other day, we did argue about which way the toilet paper should hang.
George Sr.: Who won?
Coach Wilkins: I don't remember. We just ended up making love on the bathroom floor.
George Sr.: Thank you, Wayne. This has been real helpful.
Coach Wilkins: When was the last time you took Mary out on a date?
George Sr.: I couldn't even tell you.
Coach Wilkins: Mm. That poor woman.
George Sr.: Hey. You're supposed to be on my side.
Coach Wilkins: I'd like to be. [chuckles] But you're not giving me much to work with.

Coach Wilkins: You sure you want to eat that?
George Sr.: [mouth full] Why not?
Coach Wilkins: I heard your triglycerides are through the roof.
George Sr.: Who told you that?
Coach Wilkins: My brother plays poker with your doctor.