Dale: Everybody, dig in.
Sheldon: Fun fact: did you know that pizza is only one of many Mediterranean flatbreads?
Dale: You talking to me?
Mary: Shelly, this is Mr. Ballard's first time eating with us. Let's make sure it's not his last.

Sheldon: Regardless, I'm not interested in making any more friends.
Mary: Oh, I don't think that's how you really feel.
Sheldon: It is. From now on, it's a hermit's life for me.
Mary: I bet, when you grow up, you will be surrounded by lots of smart, wonderful friends.
Sheldon: I can't see that happening.

Sheldon: Mom, when should I be expecting my testicles?
Woman: [turns around] What is wrong with him?
Mary: Nothing is wrong with him. Now turn around before I knock your lights out.
Sheldon: Hello.

Mary: Sheldon Lee Cooper, if you don't finish that pork chop, I swear I will chew it up and spit it in your mouth like a mama bird.
Missy: Do it, Mom. Do it.

Billy Sparks: Hey, Sheldon, if your pizza's too hot, put ice on it. That's what I did.

Missy: Mom, we're going to Chuck E. Cheese!
Mary: We're not going anywhere. It's almost your bedtime. Sorry, hon.
Missy: Well, all that matters is that I'm the winner.
Sheldon: Yes, you are.
Adult Sheldon: Actually, I was the winner. We spent the whole day doing everything I love: drafting contracts, arguing about rules, and most importantly, never leaving the house.

Meemaw: [on the phone] So John, I hear you're going camping this weekend.
Dr. John Sturgis: I am.
Meemaw: With the guy I'm dating.
Dr. John Sturgis: I know. It was so nice of him to let me tag along.
Meemaw: And don't you think that's gonna be a little awkward?
Dr. John Sturgis: No more awkward than any other social situation I find myself in. I'm making my, uh, homemade GORP. Good old raisins and peanuts. I'll have to give you the recipe.
Meemaw: I think I can figure it out.