Meemaw: Look at you, just wheeling and dealing like a big-time Hollywood producer. Maybe you're in the wrong business.
Mary: Being a mother?
Meemaw: Being a Christian.
Mary: Ah.

Georgie: Hey, now that you're treating him like an adult, can I have his allowance?
George: That allowance is for chores, which you already don't do.
Georgie: Come on. We all know I'm your favorite.
Meemaw: You're not even his third favorite.

Sheldon: Do people know about this?
Meemaw: Sheldon, what's on a person's face is not always what's in their heart.
Sheldon: Well, this changes everything. How do you know who to trust?
Meemaw: You don't. That's what makes life interesting.

Mary: Mom, can you make the salad?
Meemaw: Sure.
George: Hey, don't put in any of those little tomatoes.
Meemaw: Hey, I don't tell you how to impersonate a lump of clay. You don't tell me how to make a salad.

Tam: You see a large red button. What do you do?
Billy Sparks: I press it.
Tam: The floor opens up and you plunge into a 60-foot pit.
Billy Sparks: I fly out. Up, up, and away!
Sheldon: Again, you're not Superman in this game; you're Superman for Halloween.
Tam: Which isn't till next week.
Billy Sparks: So I'm in a pit.
Tam: You're in a pit.
Billy Sparks: Then I blast my way out with my super breath! [BLOWING]
Sheldon: Just let him do it.

Mary: I can't believe this.
George: No good?
Mary: It's awful. It makes sin seem like a good thing.
George: Well, that's the problem, isn't it? I mean, if sin didn't seem like a good thing, nobody would do it.
Mary: George, please, I'm in no mood.
George: Hey. Wrath. That's one of the seven sins, right?
Mary: Pastor Jeff gave me this project because he knew I'd be best at it. Now Gene Lundy is taking over.
George: Oh, look, pride. And envy. Don't stop. Four sins to go. I'm guessing lust ain't happening tonight.

Georgie: Sheldon.
Sheldon: Oh. Hi, Georgie.
Georgie: Why was Veronica Duncan hugging you?
Sheldon: I'm tutoring her in trigonometry.
Georgie: And that gets you hugs?
Sheldon: Thanks to me, she got her first C-minus. Just between us, she's a little slow.
Georgie: That's not what I heard.
Sheldon: What did you hear? Is she secretly clever? Because if she is, I completely missed it.