Mary: Can I help with anything?
Missy: Nope, just enjoy your breakfast.
Mary: Thank you. Hey, maybe we can spend the day together.
Missy: That sounds nice, but I promised Taylor I'd help him buy some back-to-school clothes.
Mary: Oh, yeah, Taylor. When do I get to meet him?
Missy: He's just a friend, Mom. Don't be weird.
Mary: I wasn't being weird.

[Sheldon groans as he turns the bathroom doorknob and realizes it's locked. He knocks on the door.]
Georgie: [o.s.] What?
Sheldon: I need to use the bathroom.
Georgie: Well, too bad, it's my turn. Check the schedule.
Sheldon: I don't see a schedule.
Georgie: Look on the fridge.
[Sheldon dashes back to the kitchen and looks at the fridge]
Sheldon: Mmm. He's right, it's his turn. This is going to be close.

Meemaw: Anyways, how are you doing? It must feel good to be home.
Mary: [nods] Yeah. I guess.
Meemaw: What's wrong?
Mary: Well, they have everything running pretty smooth without me, so... feeling a little displaced.
Meemaw: Hmm, a little displaced.
Mary: Mm-hmm.
Meemaw: 'Cause your home, which was not blown away in the tornado, is running smooth.
Mary: Oh, no, I didn't mean... [sighs] You know what I mean.

George: Go on, keep running! Y'all look like you haven't moved all summer! Come on! Lopez, what, are you taking a break out there?
Coach Wilkins: I think he's throwing up, Coach.
George: Good stuff, Lopez!

George: That's a nice surprise.
Mary: Well, I just thought I'd come hang out, watch you turn this ragtag bunch of kids into state champs.
Coach Wilkins: George, you didn't tell me Germany made her funny.
George: Hey, I think we got a real shot this year. Lopez, what the hell did you eat?

Coach Wilkins: What you got there, Mary?
Mary: Oh, I made some snacks for the team.
George: Oh, did you bring anything for the coaches?
Mary: Just a little sugar.
George: Ooh. [they kiss] [chuckles] So, we over the jet lag?
Mary: I think so.
Coach Wilkins: Okay, now I'm gonna puke.
George: Grow up.

Adult Sheldon: I returned home from Germany to a family which no longer cherished me. But I knew somewhere I was still valued, where I was still the center of attention. And, most importantly, where I had my own bathroom.

Sheldon: What are you working on?
Evan: Uh, I'm writing a Pascal compiler for an alpha processor.
Sheldon: I don't understand.
Evan: Uh... [sighs] Here. [hands Sheldon a coding book]
Sheldon: Thanks. [sits down and reads]
Evan: What's your name?
Sheldon: Do you mind? I'm reading.
Evan: Okay.

Evan: So... no video games?
Sheldon: Star Fire?
Evan: Hasn't even been released yet. I'm a beta tester.
Sheldon: Oh, my.
Adult Sheldon: I didn't know his name or where he was from, but he was my new best friend.

George: Mary, sit with me. Yeah. Oh, honey, it's- it's been so good having you back.
Mary: Oh, thank you. Oh. You know, when I was in Germany, I was thinking we should do more...
George: Hold that thought. Thing is, these practices aren't meant to be enjoyed. They're meant to be endured, survived. Hated, actually.
Mary: That sounds terrible.
George: Uh, no. It's a good thing because then they take that hate and they unleash it on the other team.
Mary: Sounds like you're turning them into monsters.
George: There you go, and monsters don't have team moms. Let me help you get this crap in the car.

Mary: Honey? You okay?
Missy: [o.s.] Go away.
Mary: All right, well, I'm here if you want to talk.
Missy: [opens door] Taylor broke up with me.
Mary: Oh, baby. Oh. Oh... [hugs Missy]
Missy: Please don't tell Dad. He didn't know we were going out.
Mary: Of course. It's none of his business.
Missy: I'm glad you're back.
Mary: Me, too. Do you want to tell me what happened?
Missy: Mm-hmm. [both go into Missy's room]