Dale: Can I give the flight risk a kiss goodbye?
Officer Gilroy: That's up to her.
Meemaw: I'm good.
Dale: She's good.

George: [on the phone] She tried to run? [chuckles] Oh, that... Oh, that makes me so happy.

Mandy: Just so you know, my plans include more than making babies so they can pick on each other. I want a career.
Georgie: I support that.
Mandy: And maybe go back to school.
Georgie: Curveball, but okay. I don't have to go back to school, do I?
Mandy: Oh, no, sweetheart.
Georgie: Thank you.

Mary: Oh. Hi.
Audrey: Why do you have the baby?
Mary: Um... It's kind of a long story.
Audrey: Why do you have the baby?
Mary: My mother was arrested, she's in jail.
Audrey: I can't get a straight answer from anybody in this family.

Georgie: You know, we should really start looking for our own place.
Mandy: You think?
Georgie: I mean, the gambling room's doing great, and since we put in the roulette wheel, we're basically printing money.
Mandy: [sighs] Sure would like to have my own bathroom.
Georgie: [sighs] Your own bathroom, one of them walk-in shoe closets like on Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous. And carpet everywhere, even in the kitchen.
Mandy: That's a terrible idea.
Georgie: 'Cause of spilling and crumbs, sure.

Sheldon: Hello.
Mary: Oh, good, you're here. Oh, thank you for bringing him, Dr. Linkletter.
Georgie: Well, you hungry? Have a seat.
Dr. Linkletter: Well, I do have a half can of tuna waiting for me at home, but what the hey?

Mandy: So, where are we going?
Audrey: What would you say to an all-expenses-paid weekend at Dollywood?
Missy: Shut up.
Mandy: Oh, my God. Thank you.
Georgie: That's amazing.
Missy: Oh, I'm definitely getting married.
Sheldon: And I won't be going.

Jim: I got you beat. My brother William... [whispers] He's a Democrat. He voted for Mondale.
George: Aw, I'm so sorry.
Jim: Mm. Actually, feels good to talk about it. [Audrey pats Jim's hand]

Georgie: Hey, little girl. In a few minutes, you're gonna be legitimate.
Mandy: You saying she's illegitimate?
Georgie: Not me, just, you know, everybody.
Meemaw: If you want to smack him, I'll hold the baby.
Mandy: Nah, it's okay. Well, just in case.
Mary: [enters] Wait! Wait!
Mandy: What are they doing here?
Meemaw: I told them, and you can't smack me 'cause I'm holding the baby.

Mary: I know you're mad at me, and I am sorry, but can we please be a part of this wedding?
Missy: Yes, please. I only have one brother.
Mary: What about Sheldon?
Missy: Yeah.

Audrey: [enters] Wait! Wait.
Meemaw: Wasn't me.
George: It was me. I called your dad.
Jim: [panting] Oh, that's a long hallway.
George: And those steps in front?
Jim: Brutal.

Georgie: I can't believe they gave us the train car.
Mandy: Well, my dad slipped the conductor five bucks.
Georgie: Classy.
Jim: So, what are you thinking? Couple buckets of spaghetti for the table?
George: Sure. Y-Yeah... and we're gonna split the tab. [Audrey elbows Jim]
Jim: It's all right, I got it.
George: Uh, Jim, come on.
Audrey: We didn't pay for a wedding, we can spring for some spaghetti.
Jim: I-In a bucket.
Audrey: We know.

Dale: I-I'm happy to chip in.
George: No, no. No, this is between me and him. And we're splitting it.
Missy: Dad, we're poor. Let him pay.
Mary: We are not poor.
Audrey: Wouldn't matter either way.
Mary: But we're not.

Audrey: [glass clinking] Amanda, Georgie, since your father and I didn't get to give you a proper wedding, we'd like to pay for a honeymoon.
Mandy: [gasps] Wow, really?
Mary: [quietly] Should we offer to split.. [George shakes his head]
Georgie: Mr. McAllister, really appreciate it, but that's not necessary.
Jim: First of all, no more of this "Mr. McAllister" stuff, okay? It's Jim.
Georgie: Thank you, Jim. Uh, very kind, Jim. This feels weird, Jim.

Meemaw: And the thing you need to know about slot machines is that they provide the house with a 17% edge. And that... is a whole lot of edge for Meemaw and your daddy.
[Meemaw looks at the CCTV camera and sees two cop cars out back]
Meemaw: Huh? Ooh, that ain't good.
[Meemaw rushes with CeeCee in her stroller through the laundromat towards the front door]
Woman: Excuse me.
Meemaw: I don't work here!
[Meemaw calmly pushes CeeCee's stroller up the sidewalk. When a police siren wails, Meemaw picks up the pace.]
Police Officer: [over P.A.] Connie Tucker? Please stop running. [siren wails]