Nathan: You going?
Sheldon: I'd like to. Are you?
Nathan: Yeah. I quit my job for the time off.
Sheldon: Wow.
Nathan: Well, my job search.
Sheldon: Hmm.
Nathan: You know, it hasn't been announced yet, but I hear there's a special guest appearance by David Gerrold.
Sheldon: He wrote the Star Trek episode "Trouble with Tribbles."
Nathan: Uh, no doy.
Sheldon: I just found my spring break.
Nathan: I'm not really looking for a job. I don't know why I lied.

Mr. Lundy: All righty then. Show me what you got.
Mary: What do you mean?
Mr. Lundy: Your sales technique. Let's go. Come on. I'm an Eskimo. Sell me some ice.
Mary: Really? Right now?
Mr. Lundy: If you can't sell to me, and I'm already Team Mary, how are you gonna sell to a stranger?

Mary: Okay. Um... Hi.
Mr. Lundy: Let me stop you right there.
Mary: What did I do wrong?
Mr. Lundy: [sighs] It's your face.
Mary: What's wrong with my face?
Mr. Lundy: It's your number one sales tool. Y-You should be advertising the product, and you're not wearing any.
Mary: Yes, I am.
Mr. Lundy: Where?
Mary: I think the best makeup is the kind that no one notices.
Mr. Lundy: Right now, you're what no one notices. This is your billboard, and I'm... [sputters] ...driving right on by.
Mary: I suppose I could put on a little more.

Mary: And if you order right now, I'll throw in some extra concealer for half off.
Brenda Sparks: I mean, this is just allergies. Does it look like I've been crying?

Sheldon: [on the phone] And since we're both on spring break, I thought you might like to go with me.
President Hagemeyer: Sheldon, I am the president of the university.
Sheldon: You're right. I should've asked you first. So is that a "yes"?
President Hagemeyer: No!

Mary: Here. Why don't you put this on, and we will try again? [Ms. Hutchins applies lipstick] Oh. Now, are you a strong, confident woman?
Ms. Hutchins: Sure.
Mary: Come on. Say it like you mean it. Are you strong and confident?
Ms. Hutchins: Yes.
Mary: One more time.
Ms. Hutchins: Yes.
Mary: So I can put you down for a starter kit?
Ms. Hutchins: Fine.
Mary: Well, all right! Whoo!

Announcer: [on TV] Attention, science fiction and comic book fans, this Friday, Saturday and Sunday in Ballroom B of the Texarkana Holiday Inn, it's Texarkana-Con! That's right, Texarkana...
Captain Kirk: [on TV] Khan!
Announcer: Celebrity appearances, panel discussions, autograph alley, only at Texarkana...
Captain Kirk: Khan!
Announcer: Raffles, prizes, costume parade, Friday through Sunday at Texarkana...
Captain Kirk: Khan!
Announcer: William Shatner not appearing.
Sheldon: William Shatner may not be appearing, but Sheldon Cooper is.

[dream sequence:]
Mary: What the heck?
Reflection Mary: [in mirror] You think you can just wash me away?
Mary: Yes, I used the gentle cleansing cream formula one with special emollients.
Reflection Mary: Exploiting your Bible study group, that was just the beginning.
Mary: I wouldn't say I exploited them.
Reflection Mary: Good, don't. It'll be our little secret. [Mary scoffs] Now, where are we with Missy?
Mary: You leave Missy alone.
Reflection Missy: [in mirror] Mom, help. I can't get out.
Mary: Missy!
Reflection Mr. Lundy: [in cabinet] Why are you sleeping?! You should be selling!
[Mary wakes up in bed]
Adult Sheldon: My mother never sold makeup again. And as Mr. Lundy predicted, Missy got her makeup from her friends.
Missy: My eye feels oozy.
Mary: What's the matter, baby? Oh.