Meemaw: Is this what you do when I'm not here?
Dale: You could've walked in on a lot worse.

Meemaw: Where we eating tonight?
Dale: Well, that depends. Why don't you look in the glovebox and check on the Tums situation.
Meemaw: There's five.
Dale: Oh, my, this is tricky. Well, Mexican's at least three apiece.
Meemaw: We might get by with two each if it's Italian.
Dale: You get red wine and then tomato sauce. Hey, if they put lemon in the water, we're dead.
Meemaw: Hmm. That leaves barbecue.
Dale: Sold.
Meemaw: Who gets Tum number three?
Dale: Me. They're my Tums.

Meemaw: I'll have the rib eye, medium rare.
Waiter: And for you?
Dale: Uh, just the house salad, please.
Waiter: Very good.
Meemaw: House salad? You watching your figure?
Dale: I have a physical tomorrow.
Meemaw: Oh, so your plan is to start eating healthy now?
Dale: Can't hurt.
Meemaw: It ain't gonna undo years of red meat and beer.
Dale: I'm not trying to undo it, I'm just trying to hide it under some lettuce.

Meemaw: I got to go open up the gambling room. Can you watch her for about an hour?
Dale: I just had coffee and a bowl of Raisin Bran. Next hour is spoken for.
Meemaw: You could've just said no.
Dale: I'm trying to keep the romance alive.

Pastor Jeff: Okay, now our next baptism is for Sheldon Lee Cooper, our soon-to-be brother in Christ. And, personally, this is a big get for me.

Caltech Professor: You lost?
Sheldon: No. I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be.
["Walk of Life" by Dire Straits plays]

[Adult Sheldon walks through his childhood home:]
Adult Sheldon: Eventually, my mom sold the house. My dad's chair was gone. My spot was gone. [sits down on couch] Where we ate together. But I can still remember it exactly the way it was the day I left for Caltech.
Missy: Hey.
[Young Sheldon turns around to face Missy]
Missy: What are you doing?
Sheldon: Taking it all in one last time, so I remember it when I'm older.
Missy: You gonna remember me?
Sheldon: I have an eidetic memory. I have no choice.
Missy: Ha.