George: What's his problem now?
Mary: Nothing. He wants to spend the night at the dorm so he can get to an early class.
George: Really? And you said okay?
Mary: He is old enough to have an overnighter, and... it might be nice for us to have a little alone time.
George: Ooh. What about Missy?
Mary: She's having dinner with a friend.
George: So, the house to ourselves. I like it. [phone ringing]
Mary: Hold on. [answers phone] Hello?
Sheldon: Number two... I have my own bathroom.

Pastor Jeff: And now George's loving wife Mary would like to say a few words. Mary.
Mary: Thank you, Pastor Jeff. Um... [clears throat] I met George in high school. Well, I was in high school. He was an older man with a motorcycle. [light laughter] I'd like to tell you he caught my eye, but actually it was the motorcycle. [laughter] [voice breaking] I'm sorry, I can't... do this. I am... so angry. [sighs] George and I had our ups and downs, but we were finally in such a good place, and then he... left. [crying] He left all of us. I- How could you do that? [Meemaw stands up] I am so mad at him. I'm mad at God, I'm mad at myself for not trying harder while he was here. [Meemaw goes up to Mary] This wasn't supposed to happen. [Mary sobs] [Meemaw hugs Mary] [Georgie hugs a crying Missy]

Sheldon: Mom, when should I be expecting my testicles?
Woman: [turns around] What is wrong with him?
Mary: Nothing is wrong with him. Now turn around before I knock your lights out.
Sheldon: Hello.

Sheldon: Regardless, I'm not interested in making any more friends.
Mary: Oh, I don't think that's how you really feel.
Sheldon: It is. From now on, it's a hermit's life for me.
Mary: I bet, when you grow up, you will be surrounded by lots of smart, wonderful friends.
Sheldon: I can't see that happening.

Sheldon: [on the phone] Hello, Mom. It's your son, Sheldon.
Mary: Hello, my son, Sheldon.
Sheldon: I have an 8:00 a.m. class tomorrow, and I was wondering if I could spend the night in my dorm.
Mary: That's fine.
Sheldon: Now before you answer, hear me out. I have a list of reasons why this is a good idea. Number one...
Mary: Sheldon, I know that you're safe there. It's fine.
Sheldon: That's reason number four. Please don't skip ahead.
Mary: Honey, I trust you. Just go to bed at a reasonable hour and call if you need anything. Otherwise, I'll see you tomorrow.
Sheldon: Okay. Number one: I'm not...
Mary: Goodbye, Sheldon. [hangs up]
Sheldon: Who hangs up on a list?

Sheldon: I've compiled a list of reasons why I should be appointed the dormitory R.A. Number one...
President Hagemeyer: Fine. You're the R.A.
Sheldon: Okay. "Number one: I love rules... creating them, following them, and most fun of all, enforcing them."
President Hagemeyer: You're the R.A., Sheldon.
Sheldon: Excellent. "Number two... punishment for rule infractions must be both fair and merciless."

[As Missy walks into the kitchen, George and Mary are kissing]
Missy: Ugh. Still?
Mary: Morning, honey.
Missy: What is happening with you two?
George: What do you mean?
Missy: Is one of you dying?
George: No one's dying. Sometimes, married people kiss.
Missy: On TV maybe, not here.
Mary: Well, young lady, how do you think you came into this world?
Missy: Okay, you're freaking me out.