‘A Baby Tooth and the Egyptian God of Knowledge’ Quotes Page 1 of 3
-
320. A Baby Tooth and the Egyptian God of Knowledge
April 16, 2020When Sheldon is put under anesthetic at the dentist's office, he has a vision of a scientific breakthrough. Meanwhile, Dale leaves Georgie in charge of the store when he and Meemaw spend a weekend away.
Quote from Sheldon
Sheldon: So none of you can help me?
Albert Einstein: I believe I can. Sheldon, if I was offered a choice between all the knowledge of the universe or the endless pursuit of it, I would choose the pursuit.
Sheldon: That's very insightful.
Richard Feynman: Hold it, hold it... He didn't come up with that! He stole it from Gotthold Lessing.
Professor Proton: Who's-who's Gotthold Lessing?
Cyndi Lauper: [v.o.] He's an 18th century German philosopher. Now do you mind? We girls are trying to have some fun over here.
Einstein: Apologies.
Richard Feynman: Sorry, Cyndi Lauper.
Stephen Hawking: Our bad.
Professor Proton: I-I like fun.
Quote from Sheldon
Ms. Hutchins: Hi, Sheldon, what can I do for you?
Sheldon: Do you have any books or videos on the Lamaze technique?
Ms. Hutchins: Uh-oh. Georgie get that girl pregnant?
Sheldon: It's for me. I need to have a tooth pulled, and I'd like to do it without putting my brain on drugs.
Ms. Hutchins: Okay.
Sheldon: I've seen that commercial with the egg in the frying pan. Very effective.
Quote from George Jr.
Georgie: Can I at least change the music we play here?
Dale: What's wrong with the music we play here?
Georgie: Nothing, it's just kind of grandpa music.
Dale: Well, how is this "grandpa music"?
Georgie: Do you listen to it?
Dale: Yeah.
Georgie: Do you have grandchildren?
Dale: Yeah.
Georgie: Do you see where I'm going with this?
Quote from George Jr.
Georgie: There you go. I hope you enjoyed your shopping experience.
Man: I did.
Georgie: I'd let the manager know, But he already does, 'cause it's me.
[later, to a woman holding a tennis racket:]
Woman: I'll take it.
Georgie: It's been a pleasure to serve you.
[later, to an older man lifting weights:]
Georgie: You might want to slow down. We don't have a license to sell guns in here. Just kidding, it's Texas. We got them in the back.
Quote from Sheldon
Sheldon: [on the phone] Hello, Dr. Bowers, it's Sheldon Cooper. I need you to administer more anesthesia to me. No, I don't have a dental problem. I need to reenter a trancelike state so I can communicate with Thoth, the god of knowledge. I would argue that the greatest discovery in physics is worth losing your dental license. Well, it's not my fault you let them publish your home phone number.
Quote from Meemaw
Meemaw: This is not exactly the date night I'd envisioned when I was shaving my legs.
Dale: I'm almost done.
Meemaw: We're elderly, you know? If anything, dinner should be early.
Dale: Well, I'll tell you what, when I'm finished, I am gonna whisk you off to the finest... And the only... Chinese food place in town.
Meemaw: Ying's? Their nachos are weird.
Quote from Ms. Hutchins
Ms. Hutchins: Well, Since this is a high school, we don't have material about giving birth on the shelves. But... since this is a high school, I... keep a few things here under the counter.
Sheldon: Excellent. And I'll let my brother know, in case he gets himself in a pickle.
Quote from Meemaw
Dale: You go to this casino often?
Meemaw: Kind of. So don't be surprised if everybody knows my name, how I take my whiskey and the color of my lucky bra.
Dale: Purple.
Meemaw: No, that's my "get lucky" bra.
Quote from Missy
Sheldon: [muffled] Where am I?
Missy: Oh, you died. You're a ghost now.
Sheldon: What?
Quote from Sheldon
Mary: So, Sheldon, little bit of dental news. You have a baby tooth that never fell out.
Sheldon: Neat. Even my teeth are stubborn.
Quote from Meemaw
Dale: I don't know, it's not a bad idea to maybe venture out of Medford once in a while.
Meemaw: Even better, why don't we go away for the weekend?
Dale: Uh, come on... You know how hard it is for me to get out of the store.
Meemaw: What's the point of being the boss if you can't get somebody else to do your work for you?
Dale: Uh, I might be able to leave Georgie in charge.
Meemaw: My grandson?
Dale: That'd be the one.
Meemaw: I want to go, so I'm just gonna say "good idea." [chuckles]
Quote from Adult Sheldon
Missy: You're having a tooth pulled, not having a baby.
Sheldon: If it can work for getting an eight-pound human through a birth canal, it can work for a tiny tooth.
Missy: Eight pounds? I'm never having kids.
Adult Sheldon: Fun fact: she ended up having four.
Missy: And if I do, I'm taking any drugs they'll give me.
Adult Sheldon: That part was true.
Quote from Mary
Dr. Bowers: Okay, Sheldon, you ready?
Sheldon: Not really.
Dr. Bowers: Yeah, that makes two of us. Why don't you guys come on back?
Mary: You know what? I'm just gonna stay here. Um, you don't need me getting in your way.
Dr. Bowers: Oh, it's no trouble at all. Come on.
Mary: I've got my crochet.
Dr. Bowers: You're coming.
Mary: Fine.
Quote from Adult Sheldon
Adult Sheldon: If I was going to recapture my insight into a unified field theory, I needed to find a way to put myself back into an altered state of consciousness. Native Americans would sit in sweat lodges for hours to achieve this. I lasted a minute and a half. Self-hypnosis is another means of bringing stillness to the mind. [Sheldon screams] When it isn't giving you a heart attack! The whirling dervishes of Central Asia employ a repetitive spinning technique to achieve a trancelike state.
Sheldon: [retches, falls down]
Quote from Adult Sheldon
Adult Sheldon: After my other attempts to return to the trancelike state of anesthesia failed, I turned to something Nancy Reagan herself told me to "just say no" to. My mind-altering substance of choice was... chamomile tea. But not your grandma's chamomile tea. A highly concentrated super chamomile of my own making. All the relaxing power of 30 cups of chamomile tea packed into a teaspoon of calming sludge.
Sheldon: Sorry, Mrs. Reagan.