[When Missy doesn't respond as Sheldon knocks on her door while she sings along to "Achy Breaky Heart", Sheldon leans in and grabs a plush toy from Missy's bed and throws it at her head]
Missy: What are you doing?
Sheldon: It felt weird coming in without being invited.
Missy: That's because everything you do is weird.

Missy: Where's Mom and Dad?
Sheldon: I don't know. I just got home and no one's here.
Missy: You sure?
Sheldon: It's a tiny house and Dad's a big guy.
Missy: Thanks for the heads-up.
Sheldon: Where are you going?
Missy: To watch R-rated movies until they get back, doy.

Sheldon: We want to know what's going on.
Missy: And we know it has something to do with a baby.
Sheldon: And we know it's not yours.
Missy: So whose is it?
Mary: This is a private matter, and it does not concern you. [Mary looks to George, who nods his approval]
Missy: It's Georgie.
Mary: You don't know that.
Missy: It all makes sense. You were talking with him in the garage the other night.
Sheldon: And word on the street is he's sexually active.
Missy: Ew. So, who's preggers?
Sheldon: Yes, who?

Mary: Family meeting now.
George Sr.: I'll leave you to it.
Mary: George!
George Sr.: Fudge.

Sheldon: Maybe we should go to the emergency room.
Missy: It's just a pimple. Pop it.
Sheldon: No.
Missy: I'll do it. I like when it hits the mirror. Now hold still.
[fantasy: A.V. and Pus are now standing, with no chair or stool in sight:]
A.V.: It seems we've reached the end of our time with Sheldon. [Pus is holding two suitcases] But it's never truly goodbye. We'll be back in moments of stress. Like a big test. Or my personal favorite, school picture day... [they disappear in an explosion of yellow pus, leaving the two suitcases]

Mandy: So, what happened?
Missy: All I know is they had a problem at the border. Something about smuggling cigarettes.
Mandy: [quietly] What an idiot.
Missy: Hey. He was just trying to make money 'cause you got pregnant.
Mandy: Oh, so this is my fault?
Missy: He didn't make that baby on his own.
Mandy: Look, you're just a kid, okay? You don't understand what's going on here.
Missy: I know my mom lost her job and got kicked out of the church because you won't marry my brother.
Mandy: I didn't know that.
Missy: So... did I win this argument? Feels like I did.

Mandy: I'm sorry about your troubles with the church.
Mary: [to Missy] What did you tell her?
Missy: Just the highlights. Oh! I forgot I punched out a kid in Sunday school.
Mary: You don't have to tell her all that.
Missy: Maybe she'll feel guilty and marry Georgie.
[Mary turns and looks expectantly at Mandy]
Mandy: No.

Missy: [over walkie-talkie] Yeah?
Sheldon: I can't sleep.
Missy: Me neither. This whole Mandy thing is a mess.
Sheldon: If you mean the nomenclature, I agree.
Missy: Norman who?
Sheldon: Nomenclature... the system of devising or choosing names for things.

Missy: Are we going to church?
Mary: I'm going.
Missy: After everything that happened? Isn't that weird?
Mary: Doesn't matter. I need to.
Missy: I'll go with you.
Mary: You don't have to.
Missy: I want to.
["Losing My Religion" by R.E.M. plays. Mary and Missy turn to look at Sheldon, who is eating his cereal]
Sheldon: What?

Missy: Ooh, can I say it?
Mary: Sure.
Missy: [clears throat] Bless us Lord for the food we are about to receive and bless the hands that prepared it. And let me have a good hair day for school pictures later this week. Let's see, what else do I want...
Meemaw: Wrap it up.
Missy: And please let my dad find a full-time job before we lose cable. Amen.
All: Amen.

Nigel: All right, hold on, do you even like comic books?
Missy: Yeah.
Nigel: What's your favorite?
Missy: Um...
[flashback:]
Sheldon: And the cool thing about the X-Men is not just that they have superpowers, but they act as a metaphor for outsiders...
[present:]
Missy: ...outsiders trying to find their place in society.
Nigel: Who's your favorite?
Missy: All of them.
Nigel: Mine, too.

Missy: And I got the job.
Sheldon: You can't work at the comic book store. If anyone should work at the comic book store, it should be me.
Missy: Sorry, we're not hiring.
Sheldon: Do I at least get a discount?
Missy: I do.

Missy: Speaking of, did you know Batman is also secretly a rich dude? Or he lives in a rich dude's basement. I'm still figuring it out. [Sheldon sighs]

George Sr.: Hang on. Is this some kind of prank?
Sheldon: It's not a prank. I just need help with my homework.
Missy: Did a bully take it from you?
Sheldon: No.
George Sr.: Is it real heavy? You need help lifting it?
Sheldon: No, I need your opinion on an ethical dilemma. "Should robots have the same rights as humans?"
Missy: That depends. What's "ethical" mean?
[Sheldon walks away]

Mary: What happened?
Missy: I don't want to talk about it.
Mary: Are you sure? I'm a pretty good listener.
Missy: Then why didn't you hear me say I don't want to talk about it?
Mary: Is this about a boy?
Missy: Mom.
Mary: I-I do have some experience on the subject.
Missy: Please, the only two boys you have experience with are Dad and Jesus. I'm gonna go talk to Meemaw. [walks off]
Mary: I know other boys.

Missy: And then he walked right on by me like I wasn't there.
Meemaw: Does he even know you like him?
Missy: I don't know. I've ignored him, been mean to him. What else can I do?
Meemaw: Sounds like you've tried everything.

Meemaw: I've got an idea. Why don't you just tell him?
Missy: But what if he doesn't like me back? I would die.
Meemaw: You will not die.
Missy: Oh, yes, I will. I will be dead, and you will be sad at my funeral.

Missy: Tomorrow, I'm gonna tell Heather what a bitch she is in front of everyone.
Mandy: No, no, no. Don't show your cards. Tomorrow, you're gonna be her best friend.
Missy: Why?
Mandy: 'Cause then she'll tell you things, and you can use those things against her.
Missy: Oh. You're good.
Mandy: I know.
Missy: It's nice to have someone to talk to about this stuff. My mom's pretty religious, and my meemaw's kind of old.
Meemaw: Hey. I'm sitting right here.

Missy: You are so wise.
Mandy: Well, I have lived a little.
Missy: And so pretty. You should be on TV.
Mandy: Actually, when I lived in San Antonio, I was a weather girl.
Missy: Oh, my God, you were a TV star?
Mandy: Monday through Friday, 5:00a.m., right before the farm report.
Missy: Okay, you're, like, my new hero.

Adult Sheldon: Science fact: sisters are the worst.