Audrey Quote #20
Quote from Audrey in the episode Community Service and the Key to a Happy Marriage
Audrey: Excuse me, are you implying my husband isn't allowed to speak his mind?
Georgie: Well, if we're gonna put cards on the table, yeah.
Audrey: [laughs] That isn't true. Tell him, Jim.
Jim: Uh...
Mandy: Like he can say anything now that you put him on the spot.
Audrey: He isn't on the spot. He is a grown man. Speak. [Jim is silent]
Mandy: Stop bossing him around. He will speak when he wants to.
Georgie: You want to get some popcorn?
Audrey: Oh, please, I've been married to the man for 35 years...
Jim: Yeah.
Audrey: ...I know what he wants.
Mandy: Maybe what he wants is for you to get off his back.
Audrey: Oh, look who's an expert on marriage after one whole month.
Audrey Quotes
Quote from the episode Baptists, Catholics and an Attempted Drowning
Mandy: Hey, would you be upset if we didn't get married by Father Donovan?
Audrey: Did that woman convince you to get married Baptist? She says it's not a cult, but I'm not so sure.
Quote from the episode An Ankle Monitor and a Big Plastic Crap House
Georgie: I can't thank y'all enough.
Jim: Oh, don't be silly. Stay as long as you need.
Mandy: It's only temporary.
Audrey: Whatever. We're just thrilled to have you and the baby here.
Georgie: And me, too, right?
Audrey: Yes, you'll be here, too.
Quote from the episode A Baby Shower and Testosterone-Rich Banter
Audrey: I know this wonderful bakery that makes a cake that looks just like a fairy-tale castle.
Mary: I was gonna make my German chocolate cake.
Audrey: She's having a girl, not starting World War II.
Mary: Castle cake it is.
Audrey: Yay.
‘Community Service and the Key to a Happy Marriage’ Quotes
Quote from Meemaw
Meemaw: [knocks] Hi, I'm Connie Tucker. I'm supposed to be reporting to my probation officer?
Officer Rhonda Thomason: You found her. Come on in.
[Meemaw moves slowly into the room with the aid of a crutch.]
Meemaw: Sorry I'm a little late. Not moving very fast today. Oof.
Officer Rhonda Thomason: Weren't you arrested running from the police?
Meemaw: Well, I have my good days.
Quote from Sheldon
Missy: Are we done?
Mary: What's your hurry?
Missy: It's paternity test day on Ricki Lake and I'm missing it.
Sheldon: If people paid more attention of what belongs where, there'd be no need for paternity tests.
Quote from Sheldon
Sheldon: That doesn't go there.
Missy: Doesn't matter.
Sheldon: Canned beans next to jarred preserves?
Missy: Who cares?
Sheldon: I care.
Missy: Well, no one cares that you care.
Sheldon: I'm someone. And I care that I care. And I care that I care that I care.