Mary: Listen, are you aware that Tam and Sheldon are playing Dungeons & Dragons?
Le Nguyen: Dungeons & Dragons?
Mary: Yes, and it's filled with demons and satanic images.
Le Nguyen: [in Vietnamese] Please talk to the white woman. I'm very busy.
Trang Nguyen: [in Vietnamese] But I've got customers.
Le Nguyen: [in Vietnamese] Please, I ask you for so little.
Trang Nguyen: [in Vietnamese] And you give me so little.

George: Uh, in case something comes up, just give us a holler. I mean, a call. If you hollered, we wouldn't hear you. [CHUCKLES] That-that was a joke.
Trang Nguyen: [FORCED] Ha-ha-ha!
George: Okay, buddy, have fun.

Pastor Jeff: Come on up here, Sheldon. Let's hear what you got.
Sheldon: I've spent the last week studying what people believe, and I've come to a conclusion.
Pastor Jeff: And what's that?
Sheldon: I'm starting my own religion.
Pastor Jeff: I'm sorry, what?
Sheldon: I'm calling it Mathology. It's based on a universal binary system.
Pastor Jeff: That's terrific, Sheldon, but this is a Baptist Sunday school.
Sheldon: I know, I'm here to convert everybody. Any takers?
Pastor Jeff: Okay. Let's go have a talk with your mom.
Sheldon: The only sin in Mathology is being stupid.

Pastor Jeff: Okay, "What God means to me." Who'd like to go first? Billy.
Billy Sparks: I'd like to go third.
Pastor Jeff: All righty.

Adult Sheldon: My mother didn't believe in elves, fairies, or dragons. But she did believe in the devil. And she did not view him as an appropriate playmate for her son.