George: What the hell, Brenda?
Brenda Sparks: What the hell, what?
George: Your friends all know about your "secret boyfriend"?
Brenda Sparks: You think that's you?
George: Well... it's not?
Brenda Sparks: No, George.
George: Well, who is it?
Brenda Sparks: I didn't tell them. I'm not gonna tell you.
George: Okay.
Brenda Sparks: Oh, God. Are you upset that there might be another guy in the picture?
George: No.
Brenda Sparks: Good. Go home to your wife.
George: I will.
Brenda Sparks: Okay. [George exits] [chickens clucking] Shut up.

Mary: So, George is mad at me, and Sheldon is mad at me, and... honestly, I'm mad at me, too.
Brenda Sparks: Will you please give yourself a break? All that you do for that family, I am surprised you didn't crack years ago.
Mary: How do you handle it all?
Brenda Sparks: I'm sitting in a chicken coop drinking a wine cooler at 11:00 a.m.... clearly, I don't.

Mandy: [gasps] Oh, a nursing bra. "Includes removable pads to prevent leakage." Wow. Thanks. That's... really thoughtful.
Brenda Sparks: Mine dripped like a faucet.
Missy: Wait, I have a question.
Mary: Please ask it later.

Mary: Hey, Brenda.
Brenda Sparks: She didn't want you to walk her in?
Mary: No. How about Billy?
Brenda Sparks: Oh, I walked him in. Found his homeroom. Explained that "homeroom" is different than his room at home. Still not sure he gets it.
Mary: Tough day.
Brenda Sparks: Yeah.
Mary: You want to get some coffee?
Brenda Sparks: I was thinking vodka, but coffee will do.

Sheldon: Mom.
Mary: [wakes up] What is it, Sheldon?
Sheldon: I know you had some questions about Star Trek, so I've compiled a detailed guide outlining all the shows, characters, and how they fit in a timeline.
Mary: Can we do this later? I've got a headache.
Sheldon: Unfortunately not. If we don't do it now, you'll be completely lost when we watch The Animated Series this afternoon.
Mary: Just 20 more minutes.
Sheldon: Mom, this is almost a hundred pages. We have to get started. In the 23rd century, alien races from around the galaxy have come together to form the United Federation of Planets, which is... open your eyes... Headquartered in San Francisco.

Sheldon: Since when is it Pancake Sunday?
Mary: Since today.
Sheldon: No, it's not. It's Kellogg's Bran Buds Sunday, like it's been for the past three years.
Mary: Well, I thought it would be fun. I'll- I'll make you any kind of pancake you want.
Sheldon: On Bran Buds Sunday?
Mary: Fine. I'll put Bran Buds in the pancakes.
Sheldon: That could work.
[cut to Mary watching Sheldon eat at the kitchen table:]
Sheldon: [mouth full] It doesn't work. [spits out food]

Mary: Hey, Missy, you awake? [knocks] It's Pancake Sunday.
Missy: [opens door] What's that?
Mary: Well, it's a fun new thing I thought we could... Where are you going?
Missy: I told you. Six Flags with Jamie's family.
Mary: Oh. Well, I could make you pancakes first.
Missy: Pancakes and roller coasters? Do you want me to barf?
Mary: Well, no.