Sheldon Quote #1101
Quote from Sheldon in the episode Uncle Sheldon and a Hormonal Firecracker
Dr. Linkletter: What is the angular momentum of the neutron and the proton inside deuterium? [no hands go up] No one? Really? Sheldon?
Sheldon: Yes?
Dr. Linkletter: What is the angular momentum of the neutron and the proton inside deuterium?
Sheldon: Oh, um, "L" equals zero.
Dr. Linkletter: Close. You're missing the four percent admixture of "L" equals two.
Sheldon: Sorry. I'm a little distracted.
Dr. Linkletter: It happens. Anyway...
Sheldon: Normally, I would have gotten that right.
Dr. Linkletter: I have no doubt. Anyway...
Sheldon: There are just some things going on at home, and I'm not allowed to talk about it.
Dr. Linkletter: And we don't want to hear about it.
Sheldon: I can tell you no one's sick in case you're concerned.
Dr. Linkletter: Anyone concerned? Show of hands. [no hands go up] No? Moving on.
Sheldon: That's why I got the answer wrong.
Dr. Linkletter: Son, it's just a mistake. Everyone makes them.
Sheldon: [inner monologue] Like my brother Georgie did when he got that girl pregnant. Don't say it. Don't say it. Don't say it. [Sheldon's hand shoots up]
Dr. Linkletter: What?
Sheldon: I need to use the restroom.
Dr. Linkletter: This is college. Just go. [Sheldon rushes out] You, red shirt. Lock the door.
Sheldon Quotes
Quote from the episode One Bad Night and Chaos of Selfish Desires
Sheldon: Missy and I broke a lot of rules the other night, and we've received no punishment.
George: [sighs] Buddy, it's been a rough week. We're just glad you're both safe.
Sheldon: But in the absence of a divine being, society's rules are what keeps a person's morality in check.
George: Well, there you go.
Sheldon: No, y-you're not following me. If actions have no repercussions, society breaks down, everything devolves into chaos.
George: You might be overthinking this.
Sheldon: I thought so, too. Then I thought about it, and I'm not.
George: Sheldon, you had one bad night. Just let it go.
Sheldon: But... I did something wrong and I got away with it. That's not okay.
George: Buddy...
Sheldon: Socrates maintained that the man who lies to himself has an enemy living within. He's not even a person. He's just a chaos of selfish desires wrapped in an animal hide.
Quote from the episode A Tummy Ache and a Whale of a Metaphor
Sheldon: Unbelievable. It's either cartoons or men in their underwear banging their heads together.
Ricky: You complain a lot.
Sheldon: Excuse me?
Ricky: Seriously, dude, you need to relax.
Sheldon: How can I relax? I'm being held captive in a bacterial playground.
Quote from the episode A Tummy Ache and a Whale of a Metaphor
Ms. MacElroy: Now, can anyone tell me why Melville shifts the narrative voice from Ishmael to Ahab? [Ms. MacElroy waits for somebody else to raise their hand] Sheldon.
Sheldon: I have a tummyache. I'd like to see the nurse.
Derek: A "tummyache"?
Sheldon: Yes, Derek, I have a tummy and it aches. Ergo, tummyache.
Derek: Ergo?
Sheldon: It's Latin, Derek.
Ms. MacElroy: Go to the nurse.
Sheldon: And to answer your question, the shifting point of view grants the reader a broader perspective of events than typically allowed by first-person narration.
Ms. MacElroy: Where were we?
Sheldon: And "ergo" is Latin for "hence," Derek.
‘Uncle Sheldon and a Hormonal Firecracker’ Quotes
Quote from Sheldon
Missy: [groans] Mom and Dad are still really upset.
Sheldon: With good reason. She's awfully old to be having a baby.
Missy: Is it really dangerous?
Sheldon: Not with modern science, but back in pioneer times, we'd be burying her down by the crick.
Missy: I'm just saying they're cranky enough, so don't be a pain in the ass.
Sheldon: I'm always on my best behavior. You're the hormonal firecracker around here.
Missy: Sheldon.
Sheldon: And thar she blows. Moby Dick. It's a book.
Quote from Sheldon
George: Where the hell's my travel mug?
Mary: I think Georgie took it, dear.
George: That son of a gun.
Mary: Missy, your father's gonna take you to school today.
Missy: Thanks, Daddy. I hope it's not too much trouble.
George: [smiles] No trouble at all, my little angel. [Mary smiles at Missy, too]
Sheldon: [to Missy] Why'd you say they're cranky? They're fine.
Quote from Meemaw
Meemaw: What's up?
Missy: Why won't Mom and Dad tell us what's going on?
Meemaw: Well, there might be several reasons for that, but right off the top of my head, I'd say none of your damn business.
Sheldon: Mom's having a baby, and that's none of our business?
Meemaw: [chuckles] Is that what you think's going on?
Missy: Isn't it?
Meemaw: No.
Sheldon: Then what's going on?
Meemaw: None of your damn business.