Adult Sheldon: [v.o.] We often regret the things we don't say. There's a lot of things I wish I had said to my dad while he was around. That I appreciated him. That I loved him. Which is why I'm grateful for the times I did tell him how I felt.
Sheldon: Tonight was fun.
George Sr.: Yeah? Why is that?
Sheldon: Dr. Sturgis was here. Everybody talked about science. It was nice.
George Sr.: It was.

Mary: Let's say grace.
Sheldon: Hang on, safety first. [puts mittens on]
George Jr.: When are you gonna get over that?
Sheldon: I would think recent events would make you value protection.
Mary: Enough.

Ms. MacElroy: Now, can anyone tell me why Melville shifts the narrative voice from Ishmael to Ahab? [Ms. MacElroy waits for somebody else to raise their hand] Sheldon.
Sheldon: I have a tummyache. I'd like to see the nurse.
Derek: A "tummyache"?
Sheldon: Yes, Derek, I have a tummy and it aches. Ergo, tummyache.
Derek: Ergo?
Sheldon: It's Latin, Derek.
Ms. MacElroy: Go to the nurse.
Sheldon: And to answer your question, the shifting point of view grants the reader a broader perspective of events than typically allowed by first-person narration.
Ms. MacElroy: Where were we?
Sheldon: And "ergo" is Latin for "hence," Derek.

Missy: What's it like to not believe in God?
Sheldon: It's great. Big fan.
Missy: Are you ever afraid you're wrong?
Sheldon: About religion? Never. About other things? Also never.

President Hagemeyer: Sheldon, Dr. Sturgis quit right before the semester started. He left me in the lurch.
Sheldon: And this is your chance to be the bigger person.
President Hagemeyer: I don't want to be the bigger person. I'll be the small, petty person. That's way more fun.
Sheldon: Please? It would make me really happy if he came back. And you said yourself my happiness is important to the university.
President Hagemeyer: Are you trying to manipulate me?
Sheldon: Hey, being small and petty is fun.

[fantasy:]
Meemaw: John, I'm sorry, I don't mean to push, but I just, I worry about you.
Dr. John Sturgis: You do?
Meemaw: Of course. You know I care about you.
Dr. John Sturgis: That means a lot. The truth is, if I could live in an alternate universe, I'd live in one where we never broke up. I hope it's okay to say that.
Meemaw: It is. Because I wish it, too.
Dr. John Sturgis: Oh, Connie.
Meemaw: Oh, John.
[reality:]
Meemaw: John? John?
Dr. John Sturgis: Huh?
Meemaw: If you could live in an alternate universe, what would it be?
Dr. John Sturgis: Oh, I haven't really given it any thought.

[fantasy:]
Dr. John Sturgis: [Southern accent] To us, it'd be as normal as boots on a cowboy.
George Jr.: That is wild.
Missy: Dr. Sturgis is correct. If indeed we grew up in another universe, our sense of normality would be formed by that universe.
George Sr.: That's enough. There are no other universes. The Bible tells us God created the Earth, not the Earths.
Mary: Ugh, why did I have to marry a preacher?
George Sr.: Because it was God's will to bless us with union.
Mary: I hope it's his plan that I hit the clubs tonight, 'cause that's gonna happen. [laughs]
Sheldon: Why am I the only normal one in this family?
Missy: If you're the only normal one, statistically speaking, you're abnormal.
George Jr.: [chuckles] Freak.