[future:]
Amy Farrah Fowler: I would love to dissect your brain to see which part is missing.
Adult Sheldon: Or you'll find an all-new structure no one's ever seen before, an evolutionary leap forward.
Amy Farrah Fowler: Don't push me, I have a bone saw. [exits]
Adult Sheldon: All these years, and the passion is still there.

[future:]
Amy Farrah Fowler: Get dressed.
Adult Sheldon: But I'm busy. I'm writing about my last few days in Texas before going to Caltech. It's very emotional.
Amy Farrah Fowler: I can see that. Hit the showers.
Adult Sheldon: [stammers] I'm right in the middle. Mom's going off the rails, I'm holding the whole family together. This is riveting stuff.
Amy Farrah Fowler: Well, I am leaving in an hour and you are coming with me. [Sheldon coughs] Stop it. You are not sick.
Adult Sheldon: You're not that kind of doctor. You don't know.

Mandy: Chicken's good, Mary.
Mary: Thank the Colonel. I wasn't up to cooking.
Georgie: 11 herbs and spices. It's a delicious mystery.

Georgie: It ain't no big deal. I did it.
Mandy: Really?
Missy: Yeah, he kissed a girl in the tub, and she punched him in the face.
Mandy: Really?
Georgie: I'm gonna say pepper's one of the secret spices. That leaves ten.

[future:]
Amy Farrah Fowler: Sheldon, I know you're not a fan of sports, but it would mean so much to Leonard to have his father in the stands supporting him.
Adult Sheldon: He knows I love him, despite his foolish and embarrassing hobby.
Amy Farrah Fowler: Sheldon, it is not a hobby...
Adult Sheldon: End of discussion.
Amy Farrah Fowler: Do not tell...
Adult Sheldon: End!
Amy Farrah Fowler: March your cute behind upstairs and get in that shower.
Adult Sheldon: Fine. But that doesn't mean I'm going. It means I value good hygiene.

Sheldon: Mandy, did you change the topic to fried chicken because my topic was awkward?
Mandy: I did.
Sheldon: And is it awkward that I'm bringing it up again?
Mandy: It's getting there.
Sheldon: It's not a magic chair, anyone can sit there, and even if spirits existed, which they don't, they can't call dibs on furniture.

Mandy: So, tell me about this girl you kissed.
Georgie: Can we please talk about something else?
Mandy: Fine.
Sheldon: Her name was Veronica Duncan, and he was madly in love with her for years.
Georgie: End of discussion.
Missy: She kind of looked like you.
Sheldon: Except taller and younger.
Missy: Mm-hmm.

Sheldon: Where are you going?
Mary: To the cemetery to visit your dad. [sighs] I don't suppose you want to join me?
Sheldon: He's not there.
Mary: I know he's not there, he's in heaven. Because he got baptized.
Sheldon: Hmm. Kudos on the rhetorical ambush. Although, if he's in heaven, why are you going to the cemetery? Ha, gotcha.
Mary: Sheldon, if you don't believe in baptism, what's the harm?
Sheldon: The harm? You're asking me to get in a big tub of un-chlorinated human filth.
Mary: Peg cleans it.
Sheldon: Does she?
Mary: Peg says she cleans it. And if that is what is stopping you, I will personally scrub it out.
Sheldon: Mother, I can't be a hypocrite. This ritual is just superstitious nonsense to make you feel better.
Mary: And you taking all your things to college isn't just to make you feel better?
Sheldon: [scoffs] You are on your game today.
Mary: That mean you'll get baptized?

Missy: It's so empty.
Sheldon: I know you're eager to turn it into a ballet studio or... a gossip parlor or whatever it is girls your age enjoy.
Missy: Everything is just so different lately.
Sheldon: Change is terrible. I've been saying it since I no longer fit in my high chair.
Missy: We spent a lot of time together in this room, huh?
Sheldon: We did.

Mandy: Hey, uh, why don't we get out of here and do something?
Missy: Like what?
Mandy: I don't know, something fun.
Missy: Can we go to a bar?
Mandy: No.
Missy: Tattoo parlor?
Mandy: No.
Missy: Do you even know what fun is anymore?
Mandy: No.

Adult Sheldon: It had been 27 days since my father's funeral and everyone was still understandably out of sorts.
Mary: Finish up, we got to get to church.
Sheldon: We already went Wednesday and Thursday.
Missy: Isn't that enough?
Mary: Jesus died for you. He didn't ask if that was enough.

[future:]
Amy Farrah Fowler: We should start getting ready.
Adult Sheldon: Oh, hold on. Want to see something neat?
Amy Farrah Fowler: Is it you starting to get ready for your son's hockey game? Because that would be neat.
Adult Sheldon: Oh, I'm not going to that. But check this out. My first laptop from 1994.
Amy Farrah Fowler: Terrific. What do you mean you're not going?
Adult Sheldon: Children on skates hitting a rubber puck with a stick. Why would I want to see that?
Amy Farrah Fowler: Because Leonard is your son, and he is one of those children.
Adult Sheldon: This is why I wanted to wait until cloning was possible. Because the old-fashioned way got us a hockey player.

Mary: [sighs] There's something I have been thinking about that I would like you kids to consider. I want you both to get baptized.
Sheldon: [clears throat] This is some good chicken. [to Mandy] See how I changed the subject when Mom made it awkward?
Mary: No, I am serious. This is important. It is about saving your souls.
Sheldon: I'm not doing it.
Missy: Me neither.

Mandy: Look, I just want to say I'm- I'm really sorry for what you're going through.
Missy: People keep saying they're sorry. It's so stupid.
Mandy: Okay. I'm sorry. [off Missy's look] Sorry. I just want you to know that I'm here for you if you need anything. I mean, after all, we are sisters... in-law.
Missy: Anything? Like a dad who's not dead and a mom who's not crazy?
Mandy: Okay, now, crazy moms, that one I know. I actually have the Girl Scout badge. [laughs]
Missy: [scoffs] I can't talk to her about anything. It's all about Jesus and God, and now, she wants me to get baptized.
Mandy: Come on, I mean, she's going through a tough time, too. [off Missy's look] Sorry. Okay, that's the last one, all right? I'm sorry. Sorry.

Mary: I know that I'm not winning any popularity contests, but I'm gonna do whatever it takes to make sure that my kids are safe. In this life and the next.
Meemaw: Damn. I really thought I was gonna bring ya around.
Mary: I'm on my game today. Sheldon said so.