Adult Sheldon: The next day, I got my cast off. In a world where I valued symmetry,
I was relieved to see that both my arms were as pale and skinny as ever. But this Texan had unfinished business to tend to.
Missy: Want me to get you started?
Sheldon: No, I can do it.
Adult Sheldon: And I did do it. I rode my bike without training wheels like an adult. It would take more than a chicken or the threat of a fractured bone to scare me. It would take a brown beast named Scraps. [dog barks]
Sheldon: Aah! Mommy?!
Adult Sheldon: I rode my bike 11 miles that day.
Sheldon: Mommy!

Adult Sheldon: My meemaw wrote...
Meemaw: "To my brave Moon Pie. You handled this like a true Texan".
Adult Sheldon: My mom wrote...
Mary: [v.o.] "Shelly, you'll always be my baby, but I'm so proud of the young man you've become. Love, Mom".
Adult Sheldon: And Billy wrote...
Billy Sparks: "Billy".

George Jr.: "Have a great summer. Georgie". Normally I'd write, "Have a bitchin' summer", but I figured you wouldn't like that.
Sheldon: I wouldn't.

Adult Sheldon: I took a moment to reflect on my journey of the last two weeks. Such emotional growth was worthy of a majestic bubble beard. Perhaps my sister was right. This was a time I'd want to remember.
Sheldon: Dad, will you sign my cast?
George Sr.: Sure.
Sheldon: And if you have any grammar questions, please ask first.

Pastor Jeff: Who would like to tell us how God touched their lives this week? [Sheldon raises his hand] Sheldon.
Sheldon: He didn't, because He doesn't exist.
Pastor Jeff: Then why raise your hand?
Sheldon: Not just any hand. My left hand. Because I'm able to overcome any obstacle.
Pastor Jeff: And maybe God helped you do that.
Sheldon: Actually, it was Stephen Hawking, and he's better because he exists.
Pastor Jeff: Yes, 'cause God made him. Anybody else? [Billy raises his hand] Billy.
Billy Sparks: Is this gonna be on the test?
Pastor Jeff: Oh, boy.

Sheldon: I will not be denied my jelly. [lid pops] Yes! Watch out, peanut butter. You're next.

Adult Sheldon: My sister's crankiness did not dampen my enthusiasm. A chicken may have fractured my arm, but nothing could break my can-do spirit.
Sheldon: All in the bowl, none on me. I call that a successful urination.
George Sr.: Great. Go teach your brother.

Sheldon: I did it. Missy, I did it!
Missy: [groans] What?
Sheldon: I slept through the night.
Missy: What time is it?
Sheldon: 6:14.
Missy: This is why people hate you.
Adult Sheldon: My sister's crankiness did not dampen my enthusiasm. A chicken may have fractured my arm, but nothing could break my can-do spirit.

Sheldon: Well, that's what I heard. And if Hawking doesn't let it stop him, then I can't let this cast stop me.
Missy: Great. Go back to sleep.
Sheldon: I will, and I'll do it all by myself. [sings] Soft kitty, warm kitty
Missy: Oh, my God.
Sheldon: Little ball of fur Happy kitty, sleepy kitty, purr Purr, purr.

Sheldon: I need Mom to sing "Soft Kitty".
Missy: Don't do it.
Sheldon: Why?
Missy: You're being a baby again.
Sheldon: But I'm injured.
Missy: Big deal. You broke your arm. Look at Stephen Hawking over there. He's in a wheelchair. You don't hear him whining about it with his robot voice.
Sheldon: So you're saying he and I are brilliant minds who have both suffered great physical adversity.
Missy: That's not even close to what I'm saying.

Sheldon: Johannes Diderik van der Waals. Nils Gustaf Dalén. Heike Kamerlingh Onnes.
Missy: What are you going?
Sheldon: Listing Nobel Prize winners in physics.
Missy: Why?
Sheldon: To keep me from cracking this cast like a coconut and scratching my skin off.

Meemaw: Look, you haven't even gotten to the worst part of it yet. They're gonna leave home. They're gonna move to another city.
Mary: Oh, Lord.
Meemaw: They're gonna tell you their loser boyfriend has knocked them up. Just to be clear, that would be you.
Mary: Sorry.
Meemaw: Turned my hair gray overnight.
Mary: I said sorry. Clearly, you're not in the mood to help.
Meemaw: Listen, it's hard being a parent, but if you do it right, they don't need you anymore.
Mary: Well, I don't like that. I get it, but I just don't like it.
Meemaw: Well, I'd point out, you'll always have your husband, but you want me to be "helpful".

Mary: Did you have a tough time when your kids started being independent?
Meemaw: I'll let you know.
Mary: What does that mean?
Meemaw: Means one of 'em is still sitting in my kitchen whining about something.
Mary: Could you be supportive for once?
Meemaw: Yes, watching your kids grow up is hard.
Mary: So how do you handle it?
Meemaw: I find a little bourbon in my coffee does the trick.

George Sr.: What's going on?
Mary: Ugh. He was muttering in his sleep that I am his training wheels. What on earth does that mean?
George Sr.: Well, let's think about it. Training wheels are for little kids. Maybe he doesn't want to be a little kid anymore.
Mary: What does that have to do with me?
George Sr.: [laughs] You have made it your life's mission to hold him up.
Mary: What are you saying here? That I am wrong to love and protect my son? That he doesn't need his mother to keep an eye on him?
George Sr.: I'm not saying that. I... I would never say that.
Mary: All right then. [exits]
George Sr.: [to himself] I'm not an idiot.

Sheldon: Washcloth?
Mary: Washcloth.
Sheldon: Soap?
Mary: Soap.
Sheldon: Shampoo?
Mary: Shampoo.
Sheldon: Baby shampoo?
Mary: Does E equal MC squared?
Sheldon: Love you.

Sheldon: My first bathroom attempt. Let's hope this goes well.
Mary: Let me know if you need help.
Sheldon: I think I'll be okay. It's just number one.
Mary: I'm here if you need me.
[After Sheldon closes the bathroom door:]
Sheldon: [o.s.] Mom, I can't get my zipper down!
Mary: I'm coming.
Adult Sheldon: I am not saying my mother and I had a codependent relationship.
Sheldon: [o.s.] Mom, I can't get my zipper up!
Mary: I'm on my way!
Adult Sheldon: But she did have a tendency to baby me, and boy howdy, was I okay with that.

Mary: Can we please just eat?
George Jr.: Chicken's good.
George Sr.: Mrs. Sparks made it.
Missy: Huh?

Sheldon: I've never operated a fork with my left hand before. I hope this goes well.
George Jr.: When my buddy Mikey got the cast off his leg, you would not believe how skinny and smelly it was. Like beef jerky with toes.

Mary: [to Sheldon] Don't worry, baby. I cut everything into bite-size pieces for you.
George Jr.: Maybe you could chew it up and spit it in his mouth.

Sheldon: Left-handed knocking. Wild. [knocks three times] Georgie?
George Jr.: [o.s.] What? [Sheldon enters Georgie's bed room]
Sheldon: You're left-handed. Now that I've joined your ranks, I was wondering if you could tell me what to expect.
George Jr.: I don't know. To me, it's just normal.
Sheldon: But the vast majority of people are right-handed. There must be some challenges.
George Jr.: It's hard to cut stuff with scissors.
Sheldon: Mom handles most of my cutting needs.
George Jr.: Uh, when you shake hands, it's the wrong hand.
Sheldon: I don't shake hands. It's disgusting.
George Jr.: Oh! When driving, the gear shifter's on the right side.
Sheldon: And I'm not old enough to drive. Being a lefty doesn't seem so bad. I don't know why you complain so much.