Georgie: I'm being nothing but nice here. I don't know why you got to give me a hard time.
Mandy: Why? I'll tell you why. You ruined my life. Is that enough "why" for you?
Georgie: Hey, you weren't so innocent. If I recall, you provided alcohol to a minor... me. That's illegal.
Mandy: You lied about your age.
Georgie: You lied first.
Mandy: Okay, you know what? Let's not do this in front of your sister.
Missy: It actually feels normal. Keep going.
Georgie: And let's not forget, I only lied 'cause you're hot.
Mandy: Oh, my God. We don't need to watch a movie about a talking baby. You're right here.

Mary: I have a wild and crazy idea.
George: Ooh, I like where this is headed.
Mary: Let's make a baby.
George: You're kidding, right?
Mary: I don't know. It might be fun to start over.
George: Fun? What house you been living in?
Mary: I'm serious. We've been getting along so great, and I have all this extra time on my hands. Uh, let's take advantage.
George: Your son's about to have a baby. You can take care of that one.
Mary: No, my mother called dibs.
George: Your mother's a million years old. You think she's gonna be changing diapers in the middle of the night? [Mary scoffs] I'll tell you what your problem is. You got kicked out of your church, your-your kids are grown up, you're feeling sorry for yourself, and, yeah, you think a baby'll solve the problem. [Mary is silent] Well? Say something.
Mary: You make me so mad. [walks off]
George: Where you going? We can still do it mad.

Dennis: What kind of business you in?
[Dale sees Meemaw slash the tires on Dennis's car in the parking lot]
Dale: Groomer.
Dennis: Hmm.
Dale: Dog groomer, yeah. Cats if you make me, but I pretty much love the doggies.
Dennis: You ever do birds?
Dale: No.
Dennis: Mm-hmm.
Dale: Birds got feathers, and they're... they're self-grooming, pretty much.
Dennis: Yeah, I always thought cats were self-grooming.
Dale: Well, people think that, but, no. No, you got to... You got to dip a cat once in a while. Well, okay then. [stands up]
Dennis: Where are you going?
Dale: Dennis, I am really sorry about this. [punches Dennis in the face and knocks him out]

Sheldon: May I help you?
Bobby: There's no hot water.
Sheldon: There is for rule followers.
Tommy: You can't just turn off the hot water.
Bobby: Yeah.
All: Yeah.
Sheldon: If you want the benefits of civilization, you have to behave in a civilized manner. The decision is yours.
[cut to Sheldon taped to the wall as rock music plays:]
Sheldon: I don't need a pen and paper to take names. [a student skateboards by] You. What's your name? You know I'll find out and there will be consequences. Hey, what are you... [a student covers Sheldon's mouth in tape] [muffled grunting]