Sheldon: What's going on?
Missy: Mom and Dad are fighting.
Sheldon: What about?
Missy: Brisket. If they get a divorce, who do you think you'll pick to live with?
Sheldon: Well, Mom, of course.
Missy: I want Mom. Pick again.

Meemaw: Mean that much to you?
George: Mary and I were dating about a month when she brought me home for dinner. I took one bite of this brisket, and I knew I loved your daughter.
Mary: Gee, thanks.
Georgie: Kind of like Sleeping Beauty, except Dad kissed meat.

Mary: You know this all goes away if you just give him your recipe for the brisket.
Meemaw: I know.
Mary: And?
Meemaw: I guess it's not going away.

[in bed together]
George: Hot damn!
Mary: George, language!

George: I might make it this weekend.
Mary: Or you could try a vegetable.
George: Vegetable? That's funny.

Sheldon: How come Georgie's not going?
Mary: He's grounded for eavesdropping on me and your father.
Missy: Well, I hope he learned his lesson.

George: Connie, you've had every opportunity to give me that recipe and you never did, because you've always treated me like an outsider.
Mary: No, she has not.
Missy: Oh, of course I have.
George: See? She admits it.
Meemaw: Damn right, I do. Never thought you were good enough for my daughter. There you were, riding around on that dumb motorcycle, knocking her up.

[Missy is outside her parents' bedroom eavesdropping on their conversation]
George: Like I'm some kind of loser, a booby prize.
Missy: Booby prize.
Mary: What was that? [Missy runs away and knocks on Georgie's door, he comes out just as Mary opens her door] Georgie, you mind your own business.
Georgie: What did I do?

Sheldon: You were there. Don't you remember?
Missy: [SIGHS] I got nothing.

Georgie: This is really good, Meemaw.
Meemaw: Really good? You're spitting the best brisket in Texas all over the damn table.
Mary: Close your mouth when you eat.
Sheldon: Or aim your face the other way.

George: Connie, one of these days, you got to give me the recipe.
Meemaw: You bet. For sure. One of these days.

Meemaw: Now, this is for your eyes only. You're not to share it with anybody.
George: I never I would never. [reading the note] You're a horrible person.
Georgie: What'd it say?
Missy: I want to know what it said.
Sheldon: Me, too.
George: Just eat.
Mary: Can I read it? [reading the note] You are a horrible person.

Mary: All right, that's enough about the brisket. You kids excited for the church picnic tomorrow?
Georgie: Not really.
Missy: I don't know.
Mary: Oh, come on. You all saw the flier. The three "F"s: food, fun and fellowship.

George: That's it. 15 years in this family, and all the time I've been nothing but a good, supportive son-in-law. I always treated your daughter right, I gave you three beautiful grandchildren. Only thing I ever asked in return was that damn recipe.
Meemaw: You're right. Get another piece of paper. I'll write it down.
George: Don't mess with me, Connie.
Meemaw: Get the paper before I change my mind.
Mary: You're gonna do it to him again, aren't you?
Meemaw: I kind of have to.

Missy: I thought Dad was coming.
Mary: No, he had work to do.
Missy: What kind of work?
Mary: I don't know. Coaching stuff.
Missy: Can't he do it after the picnic?
Mary: No, Missy, he cannot.
Missy: Why not?
Mary: Enough.