Georgie: [v.o.] Dear Mandy, there are so many things I love about you, it's hard to know where to start. But I will. Sure, I could go on and on about your beautiful... B-E...
Georgie: Where does the dang "U" go?
Georgie: [v.o.] ... pretty... boobs. But what's more important is what's underneath: Your heart.
Georgie: Oh, yeah. That's good.
Edgar: Can I cash out?
Georgie: Oh. Sure. Hey, question...if you sneak into the bathroom to watch a woman shower, is that romantic or creepy?
Edgar: Romantic.
Georgie: That's what I thought.
Georgie: [v.o.] And when you're alone in the shower...

Georgie: What are you doing?
George: Separating the whites from the colors.
Georgie: Whoa, that's racist.

Georgie: Maybe you should go across the street and apologize.
George: I can't do that.
Georgie: Why not?
George: 'Cause if I do, it sets a bad precedent.
Georgie: What's Nixon got to do with it?
George: What?
Georgie: You said "bad president," like Nixon. You know, this guy.

Georgie: Okay, in my defense...
Meemaw: You have no defense. You're an idiot.
Georgie: That was a big part of my defense.

Georgie: Well, I can write you a letter if you want.
Mandy: Please don't.
Georgie: Why not?
Mandy: 'Cause your spelling makes me sad.
Georgie: I can use small words.

Meemaw: Well, there must be a way to compromise.
Dale: Compromise? There's no compromise. You won't let me spritz your nasal passages.
Meemaw: Even if I did, that's not gonna stop the tear gas coming out of your pants.
Dale: Onions in, onions out... We talked about this, you know.

Mandy: Aw. I think it's so romantic, you two writing to each other.
Georgie: It's just 'cause he's a cheapskate.
George: It can be both.
Mandy: Well, I think it's sweet.