Georgie: I don't know what I'm doing. I don't know what's expected of me. At least you and Mom got married and were a team.
George: Yeah, you got it rougher than me.
Georgie: Does it ever stop being scary?
George: I got a call from the Mexican border that my son was in jail. What do you think?
Georgie: Fair point. Sorry.

George: And Sheldon's fine. You know what he's like. If someone took him, I'm sure they'll bring him right back.

Sheldon: There's going to be a lecture on carbon dating at the Natural Science Museum on Saturday. Who would like to take me?
George: You know what? I'd be happy to.
Meemaw: What happened to helping me at my yard sale?
George: Ooh, is that this Saturday? I'm sorry. I'm taking him to a lecture on, uh what is it? Carbonation?
Sheldon: Carbon dating. A method of determining the age of artifacts and fossils.
George: Hey, we could use that to figure out how old your grandma is.
Sheldon: That won't work. You can't carbon-date something that's alive.
George: Well, then, we'll just chop her down and count the rings.
Meemaw: Oh, George, did my "lump of clay" remark strike a nerve?
George: A little.

Georgie: A bill? Really?
George: Room and board, buddy.
Georgie: $50 a month for food?
George: The way you eat, I should've gone $50 a week.
Georgie: Laundry services?
George: Your poor mother has to touch your underwear.
Georgie: What's the $10 a month "peema" charge?
George: Oh, P-I-M-A, that's a "Pain in My Ass" tax. My way of getting compensated for you taking years off my life.

Mary: All right, what do you know?
George: Well, they're probably gonna have to pay some fine, and-and they're gonna need cash.
Mary: My son is gonna be in jail overnight?
George: What about your mother?
Mary: Oh, she's been there before.

Sheldon: Meemaw's in jail?
Mary: Uh... No.
George: Forget about it.
Sheldon: Forget about it? Do I need to remind you I remember my birth?
George: [grunts] Go to your room.
Sheldon: That was a rough day.
Mary: Rough day for me.

Sheldon: What is happening to our family?
Missy: I know. Georgie and Meemaw in jail.
Sheldon: Mom getting kicked out of the church.
Missy: Georgie having a baby out of wedlock. You know what this means, don't you?
Sheldon: What?
Missy: We really are white trash.
Sheldon: Speak for yourself. I'm in college on a full ride. But I wish y'all luck.