Mary: Georgie.
George Jr.: Hey, what are you doing here?
Mary: I know about the room in the back.
George Jr.: Do you know whether or not I know?
Mary: Yes.
George Jr.: Okay, that's gonna save us a lot of time.

George Jr.: What are you doing?
George Sr.: Separating the whites from the colors.
George Jr.: Whoa, that's racist.

George Jr.: I think the saddest part about it is just how sad it is.

George Jr.: So, Vietnam, like in Rambo.
Tam: Yes.
George Jr.: That's a cool movie.
Tam: Yes.
George Jr.: Are you in it?
Tam: No.

Mary: [prays] Please watch over Missy and Sheldon and especially Georgie. And please don't let my failings as a mother get in the way of Your plans for their lives. Amen. [gasps] Hey, baby. What's wrong?
Sheldon: Is it that obvious?
Mary: Well, you are outside, where birds live.
Sheldon: True. I'll make it quick. I'm experiencing what the Germans call weltschmerz.
Mary: Uh-huh. And what do Americans call it?
Sheldon: The pain of the world.
Mary: Sounds more fun in German.
Sheldon: Most things do.

Mary: You are unbelievable. It is bad enough for you to do all this stuff, but then to drag Georgie down into your den of sin.
Meemaw: Oh, please, it's not a den of sin. Although that is a great name. Den of Sin. That would get some butts in seats. [Mary exclaims]

Pastor Jeff: Hey, Mary. Quick question. Why can I see you through my newsletter?
Mary: Oh, sorry, I had to remove one of the ads.
Pastor Jeff: Was there anything important on the other side?
Mary: Just Peg's recipe for her grape salad.
Pastor Jeff: With the mayonnaise and the pretzels. Barf.