Sheldon: Excuse me, sir. When you're done urinating, I'd like to ask you some questions about social dynamics, intimidation, threats, et cetera. Finish up, no hurry.

Mary: Let's say grace.
Sheldon: Hang on, safety first. [puts mittens on]
George Jr.: When are you gonna get over that?
Sheldon: I would think recent events would make you value protection.
Mary: Enough.

Ms. MacElroy: Now, can anyone tell me why Melville shifts the narrative voice from Ishmael to Ahab? [Ms. MacElroy waits for somebody else to raise their hand] Sheldon.
Sheldon: I have a tummyache. I'd like to see the nurse.
Derek: A "tummyache"?
Sheldon: Yes, Derek, I have a tummy and it aches. Ergo, tummyache.
Derek: Ergo?
Sheldon: It's Latin, Derek.
Ms. MacElroy: Go to the nurse.
Sheldon: And to answer your question, the shifting point of view grants the reader a broader perspective of events than typically allowed by first-person narration.
Ms. MacElroy: Where were we?
Sheldon: And "ergo" is Latin for "hence," Derek.

Missy: What's it like to not believe in God?
Sheldon: It's great. Big fan.
Missy: Are you ever afraid you're wrong?
Sheldon: About religion? Never. About other things? Also never.

Tam: Look at this, my mother left me a note. "You can do better. Mom." Not "Love, Mom," not "XO, Mom," just "Mom."

Meemaw: Your takeaway should be that you are the reason she's such a good mom, which she is. And the next time you hurt her feelings - which you will - you might remember how much you mean to her.
Missy: Now I feel bad.
Meemaw: [Meemaw hugs Missy] Good.

Sheldon: Good news, I just spoke to Tommy Clarkson.
George Jr.: What? Are you crazy?
Sheldon: Nope, Mom had me tested.