Billy Sparks: Uh, hello, Mr. Cooper. Is Missy home?
George Sr.: Hello, Billy. No, she's at church.
Billy Sparks: I brought her eggs from my chickens.
George Sr.: I see that.
Billy Sparks: You can boil them or scramble them.
George Sr.: Okay.
Billy Sparks: I like fried.
George Sr.: Okay.
Billy Sparks: I don't like poached.
George Sr.: Okay. Thank you for your time. [hands over the eggs]
Billy Sparks: Okay.

Billy Sparks: Hello.
Herschel Sparks: Hey.
George Sr.: Hey, Billy.
Billy Sparks: Was this fence window always here?
Herschel Sparks: No, son, that's a new fence window.
Billy Sparks: Anybody else getting dizzy?

Sheldon: How do we love our neighbors when our moms hate each other?
Billy Sparks: Who does your mom hate?
Sheldon: Your mom.
Billy Sparks: Hey, my mom hates your mom. Small world.

Billy Sparks: Who's Melissa?
Missy: Me.
Billy Sparks: Then who's Missy?
Missy: "Missy" is short for "Melissa." Like how "Billy" is short for "William."
Billy Sparks: I don't understand.
Missy: You know how your real name is William?
Billy Sparks: I'm Billy.
Sheldon: No, we call you Billy, but your real name is William.
Billy Sparks: But my underpants say "Billy" in them. Mom, is my name William?
Brenda Sparks: [sighs] Yeah.
Billy Sparks: Then whose underpants am I wearing?

Sheldon: Do people know about this?
Meemaw: Sheldon, what's on a person's face is not always what's in their heart.
Sheldon: Well, this changes everything. How do you know who to trust?
Meemaw: You don't. That's what makes life interesting.

Adult Sheldon: I've often been asked why I never learned to drive a car. This night is your answer.

Adult Sheldon: But I wasn't a good sport. At that moment, I vowed to come back the following Sunday and destroy Pastor Jeff.