Latest Quotes

Quote from the episode A Research Study and Czechoslovakian Wedding Pastries

George Sr.: Listen, why don't we just go there this Saturday and give it a try?
Mary: And if you don't like it, we don't have to do it again.
George Sr.: Or they'll love it, and they'll do it till they're 18, 19 years old.
Sheldon: I already love it.
George Sr.: My man. Missy? I believe there might be a Dairy Queen on the way there.
Missy: Can I get an Oreo Blizzard?
George Sr.: You know what I think? I think you're smarter than him.

Quote from the episode A Research Study and Czechoslovakian Wedding Pastries

George Jr.: Why don't they want to test me?
George Sr.: Georgie, not now.
George Jr.: 'Cause I'm available.

Quote from the episode A Research Study and Czechoslovakian Wedding Pastries

Missy: I don't want to do it.
Sheldon: Why not?
Missy: They probably just want to find out why you're so smart and I'm just average.
Sheldon: [QUIETLY] Average? That's a little generous.

Quote from the episode A Research Study and Czechoslovakian Wedding Pastries

George Sr.: Well, a couple of scientists at the college where Dr. Sturgis teaches are doing a research study on twins. They want to meet you guys, ask you some questions.
Sheldon: Oh, boy, a research study. Will they give us written tests?
George Sr.: Yeah, I think so.
Sheldon: Oh, boy.

Quote from the episode A Research Study and Czechoslovakian Wedding Pastries

George Sr.: So, Sheldon, Missy, we got some exciting news.
Sheldon: Georgie took a bath?
George Jr.: No. And how come I don't get exciting news?
George Sr.: This isn't about you.
Mary: But after dinner, why don't you go rinse off?

Quote from the episode A Research Study and Czechoslovakian Wedding Pastries

Mary: Well I suppose we could give it a try.
George Sr.: There you go. I'll call Sturgis, tell him we're in. [QUIETLY] Baby, I'm getting a fishing boat.

Quote from the episode A Research Study and Czechoslovakian Wedding Pastries

George Sr.: And we could put the money aside for their college education.
Mary: That's a good point.
George Sr.: It's a great point. I don't have to tell you, times are changing. Kids are pitching in. Like that Webster kid on TV. He's making buckets of money for his parents.

Quote from the episode A Research Study and Czechoslovakian Wedding Pastries

Mary: And what about Missy? Aren't these tests gonna make her feel bad that she's not as smart as Sheldon?
George Sr.: [SNORTS] I'm not as smart as Sheldon. Doesn't make me feel bad.

Quote from the episode A Research Study and Czechoslovakian Wedding Pastries

Mary: But Sheldon's already self-conscious about being different from other kids. I worry how this might affect him.
George Sr.: You're being too protective. He's a rock.
Mary: A rock? Are we raising the same child?

Quote from the episode A Research Study and Czechoslovakian Wedding Pastries

George Sr.: No. See, Mary, that's the best part There's no pokin' and proddin'.

Quote from the episode A Research Study and Czechoslovakian Wedding Pastries

George Sr.: Well, geez, I don't I don't know if I want some scientists pokin' and proddin' the kids.
Meemaw: Oh, but they wouldn't be poked and prodded. They just have to, you know, answer some questions.
Dr. John Sturgis: And maybe some puzzles and tests.
George Sr.: That's not too bad. Where is it?
Dr. John Sturgis: Houston.
George Sr.: Oh, it just got bad. That's that's a long drive.
Dr. John Sturgis: It does pay $50 an hour plus gas and expenses.
George Sr.: Really?
Meemaw: I told you to start with that.

Quote from the episode A Research Study and Czechoslovakian Wedding Pastries

Dr. John Sturgis: So, some colleagues of mine at the university are doing a research study on twins. I told them about Sheldon and his sister, and they were most intrigued.
George Sr.: Uh, what kind of study?
Dr. John Sturgis: It's a longitudinal investigation of environmental and genetic factors in the development of cognitive and other capacities in pairs of fraternal and identical twins.
Meemaw: You asked.

Quote from the episode A Research Study and Czechoslovakian Wedding Pastries

George Sr.: So, what's up? You comin' to me to ask for Connie's hand in marriage?
Dr. John Sturgis: No. But if that were to come to pass, are you authorized to bless the union?
Meemaw: He was joking.
Dr. John Sturgis: Oh.

Quote from the episode A Research Study and Czechoslovakian Wedding Pastries

George Sr.: Hey.
Dr. John Sturgis :Hello.
Meemaw: You got a minute? John has something he wants to talk to you about.
Dr. John Sturgis: I brought you kolaches.
George Sr.: Ooh, yummy.

Quote from the episode A Research Study and Czechoslovakian Wedding Pastries

Adult Sheldon: The bond between twins is an incredibly close one, which is why I moved 1,500 miles to California the first chance I got.

Quote from the episode A Research Study and Czechoslovakian Wedding Pastries

Sheldon: Did you kill it?
Missy: Yup.
Sheldon: Are you sure?
Missy: You tell me. [pointing the shoe at Sheldon]
[Sheldon screams and runs away]

Quote from the episode A Research Study and Czechoslovakian Wedding Pastries

Sheldon: Get it! Get it!
Missy: It's just a spider. Calm down.
Sheldon: It's got eight legs and fangs. I see no reason to be calm.

Quote from the episode A Research Study and Czechoslovakian Wedding Pastries

Adult Sheldon: While my sister and I are twins, we've always been different. By the age of two, I was reading books. Missy was content to eat them. By five, I had a healthy appreciation for a well-organized work space. My sister, less so.

Quote from the episode A Financial Secret and Fish Sauce

George Sr.: I'm guessing you're mad at me.
Meemaw: Aw, forget about it.
George Sr.: I appreciate you not ratting me out about the picnic.
Meemaw: Well, we had a deal. Besides, your marriage is already hanging by a thread.
George Sr.: It is dangling there. All right, well, I'm gonna turn in. Good night.
Meemaw: Night!
[Meemaw phones Mary:]
Mary: Hello?
Meemaw: So, get a load of this. Last church picnic, your husband snuck in a six-pack, polished off the whole thing, then went to wait in line for the bathroom-
George Sr.: Hey. You got an extra toothbrush?
Meemaw: Under the sink, darlin'.
George Sr.: Thanks.
Meemaw: You got it. [returning to the phone call:] So then the big gorilla decides he doesn't want to wait in line, so he stumbles over to the church vegetable garden and proceeds to irrigate the whole damn thing.
Mary: I've eaten those vegetables.
Meemaw: Sweet dreams. [LAUGHS]

Quote from the episode A Financial Secret and Fish Sauce

Missy: I love everything about this.