Meemaw: What's up?
Sheldon: How much do you love me?
Meemaw: What do you want?
Sheldon: I want you to buy our house.
Meemaw: Why?
Sheldon: So my room is there when I need it.
Dale: I thought you couldn't wait to leave Medford.
Sheldon: Just because I don't want to come back to a place doesn't mean I don't want to have a place that I don't want to come back to.
Dale: That makes sense to me.
Sheldon: Great, let's talk escrow.

Ms. MacElroy: Now, can anyone tell me why Melville shifts the narrative voice from Ishmael to Ahab? [Ms. MacElroy waits for somebody else to raise their hand] Sheldon.
Sheldon: I have a tummyache. I'd like to see the nurse.
Derek: A "tummyache"?
Sheldon: Yes, Derek, I have a tummy and it aches. Ergo, tummyache.
Derek: "Ergo"?
Sheldon: It's Latin, Derek.
Ms. MacElroy: Go to the nurse.
Sheldon: And to answer your question, the shifting point of view grants the reader a broader perspective of events than typically allowed by first-person narration.
Ms. MacElroy: Where were we?
Sheldon: And "ergo" is Latin for "hence," Derek.

Pastor Jeff: Come on up here, Sheldon. Let's hear what you got.
Sheldon: I've spent the last week studying what people believe, and I've come to a conclusion.
Pastor Jeff: And what's that?
Sheldon: I'm starting my own religion.
Pastor Jeff: I'm sorry, what?
Sheldon: I'm calling it Mathology. It's based on a universal binary system.
Pastor Jeff: That's terrific, Sheldon, but this is a Baptist Sunday school.
Sheldon: I know, I'm here to convert everybody. Any takers?
Pastor Jeff: Okay. Let's go have a talk with your mom.
Sheldon: The only sin in Mathology is being stupid.

Mary: Too bad. We are going.
Sheldon: Class is starting tomorrow. I'm not going anywhere.
Mary: Sheldon, do not argue with me. You are going home.
Sheldon: Mom, the people of Germany are obsessed with rules and devoid of humor. I am home.

Mr. Givens: Caltech? Fantastic.
Sheldon: For Caltech? I know.
Mr. Givens: Mm. Well, I'm sure you're gonna do great things.
Sheldon: I hope so. I intend to. I'm being modest. I will.
Mr. Givens: You're taller, but you're still the same.
Sheldon: It's fun, isn't it?
Mr. Givens: Okay. Good luck at Caltech, Sheldon.
Sheldon: I don't believe in luck.
Mr. Givens: Well, here's hoping that a random universe works out in your favor.
Sheldon: Thank you. Bye.
Mr. Givens: Hmm. [to his class] That young man might change the world someday. Or blow it up. Who's to say?

Sheldon: [knocks three times] Meemaw. [knocks three times] Meemaw. [knocks three times] Meemaw.
Meemaw: [opens door] Does that mean I have to say hello three times?
Sheldon: No, that would be crazy.
Meemaw: Agreed.

George: It's nothing like that. I got a job offer from Rice.
Georgie: A-Roni?
George: University.
Georgie: You can understand the mistake.