Adult Sheldon: I always believed my extraordinary life would be chronicled in numerous biographies. I even used to make up my own titles. My favorites were: "From Texas to Success: the Sheldon Cooper Journey", and "Cooper for Kids", a pre-school introduction to quantum gravity in superstrings. The point is, I knew my formative years would be well-documented, which meant I needed to polish up some of my early academic credentials, especially East Texas Tech.

Adult Sheldon: I didn't realize until years later that my father was only asking questions about lightning and thunder to cheer me up. In fact, he would often pretend to be dumb just to make me feel better.

Adult Sheldon: My father didn't always get the credit he deserved. The advice he gave me actually worked out pretty well. Of course, I never told him.
George: Talked to Billy.
Missy: Why would you do that?
George: No, it was good.
Missy: Stay out of my life.
Adult Sheldon: He may not have been the world's greatest dad. But maybe we weren't the world's greatest kids.

Adult Sheldon: Ignoring things that irritate me isn't my strong suit. Obsessively fixating on them, now that's what gets me out of bed in the morning.

Sheldon: If W is the Kähler metric on the algebraic variety X, and the canonical bundle KX is trivial, then X is what?
Dr. John Sturgis: A Zariski space.
Sheldon: Wrong. [slaps Dr. Sturgis's hand with his pencil]
Dr. John Sturgis: Hey!
Dr. Linkletter: Obviously, it's an elliptic curve.
Sheldon: Wrong. [slaps Dr. Linkletter's hand with the pencil]
Dr. Linkletter: Hey!

Dr. John Sturgis: Why are you hitting us?
[flashback:]
Mei-Tung: Wrong.
Sheldon: Ow! Why'd you hit me?
Mei-Tung: Pain is the best teacher.
[present:]
Sheldon: I'm teaching you.
Dr. Linkletter: Well, it feels like you're hitting us.
Sheldon: Like you, I struggled with these concepts, but eventually, I mastered them, through hard work, resilience and a healthy dose of knuckle whacking.

Dr. Linkletter: Son, we are accomplished scientists. We won't be treated like this.
Sheldon: Very well.
[flashback:]
Professor Salzman: Class, who knows where the dummkopf went wrong?
Sheldon: Dummkopf? You're calling me a dummy?
[present:]
Sheldon: There's also public humiliation. That was quite effective. Are you old dummkopfs ready to learn, or is it past your bedtime?
Dr. John Sturgis: Oh, I'm good till at least 7:30.