Missy: One question.
George: Yes?
Missy: What's 0600?

Sheldon: While Dad's gone, I'm the man of the house, and the man of the house has to enforce the rules.
Missy: The man of the house is about to get his teeth knocked out.
Sheldon: Puberty's made you mean.
Missy: I need to know what happened on my show.
Sheldon: And you'll find out when your privileges are restored.
Missy: I can't wait that long, each episode builds on the last. Imagine a Star Trek that ends with "to be continued," and you don't get to continue.
Sheldon: That would never happen, because I follow the rules.
Missy: You are this close to a purple nurple.
Sheldon: [covers nipples] You leave my nurples alone.

Missy: I'm totally into old movies. You know, Breakfast Club, Goonies, Pretty in Pink.

Missy: Eat dirt. Eat it.
Meemaw: Kick his ass!
Missy: Does it taste good? Huh?
Dale: Yeah, listen to your meemaw. Kick his ass!
Missy: You gonna cry? Huh? Do it. Cry.
Mary: Do something. Break it up.
George: H-Hang on. She's winning.
Mary: Missy! Missy Cooper, you stop beating up that boy!
Meemaw: Punch him in the nuts!

Mary: And please look after Sheldon and I as we travel to Germany.
Sheldon: "Sheldon and me".
Mary: [sighs] God doesn't care about grammar.
Sheldon: You're not gonna be on a ten-hour flight with God.
Georgie: I bet it's gonna feel longer than ten.

Mandy: Okay, we got diapers, wipes, change of clothes, bottles, binkies, bibs.
Georgie: And we got your boobs, so we're set on food.
Mandy: Okay, please don't bring my boobs up when we're at my parents' house.
Georgie: Well, what if it comes up naturally?
Mandy: It won't.

Sheldon: When we get there, you'll be looking for "international departures".
George: Ah, well, thanks for letting me know that Germany's in a different country.
Sheldon: Is he joking? I'd like to believe he's joking.
Mary: He's joking, Sheldon.
Sheldon: He's a football coach. I don't know what he knows.