Meemaw: I'm sorry, I'm just not comfortable with it.
June: You think I am? Last time he saw me naked, gravity was on my side.
Meemaw: Then why'd you ask him to do it?
June: Who else am I gonna ask, Connie?
Meemaw: You got tons of friends.
June: I've got acquaintances, I've got clients. Those aren't exactly people you want looking at your hernia scar.
Meemaw: And Dale is?
June: I got that hernia by dragging him onto the bed one night he came in passed-out drunk. Look, I'm sorry if I crossed the line, but you have nothing to worry about.
Meemaw: Okay.
June: Look, I promise, next time, I'll get the kid who mows my lawn to come over and hose me off in the backyard.
Meemaw: Call me. I'd be happy to hose you off in the backyard.

June: Whoa, and the '70s are back. All we need are the Bee Gees and bell-bottoms, and it's Studio 54.
George Jr.: I don't know what any of that means, but all right.
June: So, I guess your meemaw came over on our side.
George Jr.: No. She pissed me off, so now she gets a disco ball.
June: I don't want to get caught in the middle of a family squabble.
George Jr.: Oh, don't worry, she'll know it was me.
June: Then I love it.
George Jr.: Now, what's a Bee Gee?
June: It's a brother singing band. They did all the music for Saturday Night Fever.
George Jr.: What's Saturday Night Fever?
June: Damn, I'm old.

June: Hey, y'all.
Meemaw: Hey, June. Glad you finally came down.
June: This is so fun, sneaking in through the back alley. [chuckles] Y'all should get a secret knock.
George Jr.: 'Cause secrets are fun, right?
June: Absolutely.
George Jr.: [to Meemaw] Told you.
Meemaw: Go do your job.
June: So, how's this all work?
Meemaw: You play, you lose, you go home smelling like cigarettes.
June: You just described my love life. [Meemaw laughs]

Meemaw: So, Georgie found the manual and figured out what the problem was.
June: I know the problem. I cleaned you out.
Meemaw: Because when these machines get unplugged, they reset at the highest possible payout.
June: Wow, sounds like your problem.
Meemaw: Well... I don't have $11,000.
June: I understand.
Meemaw: Thank you.
June: So, what are you gonna do about it?
Meemaw: Well, obviously, lunch is on me.
June: Oh, wow. The whole lunch? Even the little frilly toothpicks?
Meemaw: What do you want me to do?
June: Make me a partner.
Meemaw: What? No. I already brought Georgie in, I have to pay the police off, I can't have another hand in the till.
June: Sounds like your problem again.

Adult Sheldon: Engineering has a rich and storied history, dating back to ancient times. Some consider it the single most important field of study... Okay, w-wha... no. Stop. I'm sorry. Howard, I can't do this.
Howard Wolowitz: You asked me to write you an introduction to engineering.
Adult Sheldon: Yes, and if I wanted a comedy routine, I'd have gone to Billy Crystal.
Howard Wolowitz: Just let me read it. [clears throat] Engineering has a rich and storied history dating back to ancient times. Some consider it the single most important field of study known to man, from the wheel to the International Space Station, which I went to.
Adult Sheldon: Honestly, this again?
Howard Wolowitz: Like we don't hear about your Nobel Prize all the time.
Adult Sheldon: It's not my fault people ask about it.
Howard Wolowitz: Because you're always wearing it! You have it on right now.
Adult Sheldon: Look how shiny it is.
Howard Wolowitz: [sighs] Just tell your story.

Howard Wolowitz: Wait, so after all this time, that's your problem with engineering?
Adult Sheldon: Evidently.
Howard Wolowitz: So all the teasing and all the abuse had nothing to do with me?
Adult Sheldon: I'll admit, at first, I had a chip on my shoulder because of that class, but then it was mostly you.
Howard Wolowitz: Unbelievable. When will I learn?
Adult Sheldon: I could give you that answer, but if you figure it out for yourself, it'll mean so much more.
Howard Wolowitz: Goodbye, Sheldon.
Adult Sheldon: Bye.

June: I got to admit, I'm a little jealous.
Meemaw: Of what?
June: You.
Meemaw: Why?
June: You have the Dale I never got. I spent a lot of time polishing that turd, and you get all the benefits.
Meemaw: Hey, I put my time in on that, too.
June: Not as much as me.
Meemaw: When I met him, he was a mess.
June: [laughs] You should've seen where I started.
Meemaw: Well, I think we can both agree, he is one lucky turd.
June: Amen, sister.