George Jr.: Fine. Good luck laundering this money without me.
Meemaw: You know how to do that?
George Jr.: I've seen Scarface, like, ten times.
Meemaw: Great. I'll just watch Scarface.
George Jr.: Dang it.

George Jr.: I think the saddest part about it is just how sad it is.

George Jr.: What are you doing?
George Sr.: Separating the whites from the colors.
George Jr.: Whoa, that's racist.

George Jr.: So, Vietnam, like in Rambo.
Tam: Yes.
George Jr.: That's a cool movie.
Tam: Yes.
George Jr.: Are you in it?
Tam: No.

Meemaw: How much did Dale pay you?
George Jr.: Uh, minimum wage plus five percent commission.
Meemaw: I'll give you half of that.
George Jr.: So, two and a half percent commission?
Meemaw: No, half of the minimum wage part.
George Jr.: What about a percentage of these?
Meemaw: [laughs] Yeah, right.
George Jr.: I'm serious. If it wasn't for me, none of this would be happening.
Meemaw: I'm your grandmother. If it weren't for me, you wouldn't be happening.

Sheldon: [knocks on door] Missy, I know you're upset. Would you like a hot beverage?
Missy: [o.s.] Go away.
Adult Sheldon: Every culture has their taboos. In the Ukraine, it's rude to whistle indoors, and they're correct. Not a fan. In our society, any discussion of human reproduction seems to be so upsetting, it causes nothing but chaos. Lost jobs. Lost friends. Sleepless nights. Even the word "sex" provokes an uncomfortable reaction. I thought "fornicate" might work, but that seemed too judgy. Then I found the perfect word, a word so bland and clinical that it would be impossible to take offense to it.
Sheldon: "Coitus." That'll work.

Meemaw: I'll tell you what, we're in the gambling business, why don't we gamble for it?
George Jr.: Okay.
Meemaw: Great. The number I'm thinking of in my head... is it odd or even?
George Jr.: How dumb do you think I am?
Meemaw: In my defense, you used to be dumber.