Pastor Jeff Quote #25
Quote from Pastor Jeff in the episode A Broom Closet and Satan's Monopoly Board
Pastor Jeff: The Lord just sent me a message.
Officer Robin: Really?
Pastor Jeff: I'm sorry. I can't be in a physical relationship outside of marriage.
Officer Robin: Okay. I respect that.
Pastor Jeff: Thank you.
Officer Robin: So when are we getting married?
Pastor Jeff: Uh...
Pastor Jeff Quotes
Quote from the episode A Parasol and a Hell of an Arm
Mary: You wanted to see me, Pastor?
Pastor Jeff: Cop a squat. Uh, please, have a seat. I just wanted to thank you for all the work you've done preparing for the carnival.
Mary: Anything for the church.
Pastor Jeff: I'm so glad you said that. How would you feel if... we put Sheldon in the dunk tank?
Mary: What? No.
Peg: Aw.
Pastor Jeff: But imagine how much people would pay to dunk him. We'd raise so much money.
Peg: I'm in for $20, easy.
Mary: I'm not having people throw baseballs at my son.
Pastor Jeff: They throw them at a target. He's in a cage.
Mary: No!
Peg: Boo.
Pastor Jeff: Okay. I respect your decision.
Mary: Is that all?
Pastor Jeff: Yes.
Peg: Well, damn.
Pastor Jeff: [to the heavens] I do so much for you.
Quote from the episode A Frankenstein's Monster and a Crazy Church Guy
Mary: Well, we disagree. Reverend Travis says that the Lord wants me to be prosperous and I believe him.
Pastor Jeff: This is nothing but a coincidence. You overpaid your taxes, you got a refund, Jesus has nothing to do with it.
Mary: You sound like Sheldon.
Pastor Jeff: I believe I know my way out. [Mary points to the door]
Quote from the episode Memoir
Pastor Jeff: Okay, now our next baptism is for Sheldon Lee Cooper, our soon-to-be brother in Christ. And, personally, this is a big get for me.
‘A Broom Closet and Satan's Monopoly Board’ Quotes
Quote from Mr. Givens
George: Hey, Hubert. Was Sheldon in class today?
Mr. Givens: Nope. Haven't seen him all week.
George: Weren't you gonna say anything?
Mr. Givens: I didn't want to jinx it.
Quote from Ms. Ingram
George: So he hasn't been in any of your classes?
Ms. Ingram: Mm-mm, not a one.
Ms. MacElroy: Nope.
George: But I bring him here, I take him home he's got to be somewhere in the building.
Ms. Ingram: Mm, I might've seen him in the library. But at this point, I sometimes think I see him when I'm alone in my house.
Ms. MacElroy: Like that creepy Chucky doll in the movies?
Ms. Ingram: [laughs] Exactly!
Quote from Sheldon
[Sheldon is chuckling as he stares at a blank screen]
Missy: What are you doing?
Sheldon: Watching last week's Professor Proton in my mind.