Ms. MacElroy: Remember, the food drive ends Friday. All canned goods are welcome. But please make sure your cans have labels. Needy people have enough problems without having to guess what's for dinner.

Ms. MacElroy: That's sweet of you for asking, but I'd rather stick my finger in a pencil sharpener and crank away.

Ms. MacElroy: Tell you what I do. I send him on little errands. Like the other day, I told him, "Go to the supply room and get me a framastan."
Coach Wilkins: What's a "framastan"?
Ms. MacElroy: No such thing. I made it up. He was gone the whole period.
Ms. Ingram: [laughs] I'm using that.
Ms. MacElroy: Don't use "framastan". That's mine.

Ms. MacElroy: Georgie Cooper?
Georgie: Here.
Ms. MacElroy: Sheldon Cooper? Georgie, where's your brother?
Georgie: I don't know.
Ms. MacElroy: Good enough for me.

George: And Sheldon's fine. You know what he's like. If someone took him, I'm sure they'll bring him right back.

George: If we take him to a shrink, it feels like we're admitting something's wrong with him.
Mary: He hasn't had solid food in five weeks.
Meemaw: Well, if there is something wrong with him, it ain't constipation.

Missy: Meemaw, are you gonna have any more babies?
Meemaw: Good Lord, no!
Georgie: She's too old to have any more babies.
Meemaw: Don't have to have 'em. You live long enough, your hair and your teeth start falling out, you start wetting the bed, you get to be one.
Georgie: [laughs] That's funny. We're gonna have to put a diaper on you.
Meemaw: You won't be laughing when you're doing it. I might be.