George: Thanks for having me on.
Anchor: You're welcome. Now, I understand you wanted to set the record straight regarding your son's communism.
George: Yes. N-No! He's not a communist. He's ten years old. Listen, I fought for this country.
I love this country. My kids love this country. Isn't that right, Sheldon?
Sheldon: Yes. Although, in all fairness, the Social Security system is a form of-
George: You love this country!
Sheldon: I love this country.

Ms. MacElroy: Now, can anyone tell me why Melville shifts the narrative voice from Ishmael to Ahab? [Ms. MacElroy waits for somebody else to raise their hand] Sheldon.
Sheldon: I have a tummyache. I'd like to see the nurse.
Derek: A "tummyache"?
Sheldon: Yes, Derek, I have a tummy and it aches. Ergo, tummyache.
Derek: "Ergo"?
Sheldon: It's Latin, Derek.
Ms. MacElroy: Go to the nurse.
Sheldon: And to answer your question, the shifting point of view grants the reader a broader perspective of events than typically allowed by first-person narration.
Ms. MacElroy: Where were we?
Sheldon: And "ergo" is Latin for "hence," Derek.

Pastor Jeff: Come on up here, Sheldon. Let's hear what you got.
Sheldon: I've spent the last week studying what people believe, and I've come to a conclusion.
Pastor Jeff: And what's that?
Sheldon: I'm starting my own religion.
Pastor Jeff: I'm sorry, what?
Sheldon: I'm calling it Mathology. It's based on a universal binary system.
Pastor Jeff: That's terrific, Sheldon, but this is a Baptist Sunday school.
Sheldon: I know, I'm here to convert everybody. Any takers?
Pastor Jeff: Okay. Let's go have a talk with your mom.
Sheldon: The only sin in Mathology is being stupid.

Mary: Too bad. We are going.
Sheldon: Class is starting tomorrow. I'm not going anywhere.
Mary: Sheldon, do not argue with me. You are going home.
Sheldon: Mom, the people of Germany are obsessed with rules and devoid of humor. I am home.

Georgie: You sure you want to be seen with me?
Veronica: Oh, please. You're not a commie.
Georgie: Everyone else seems to think I am.
Veronica: Do you even know what a communist is?
Georgie: Yeah. It's the big blond guy Rocky fights in Rocky IV. And he also fights them when he's Rambo.
Veronica: [CHUCKLES] That's it?
Georgie: Well, I know in every movie it looks like the commies are gonna win, but they don't. You ever seen any Rocky movies?
Veronica: Um, I saw Rocky II.
Georgie: That's the second one.

Meemaw: [singing] Oh, say, does that star-spangled banner, Yet wave-

Meemaw: [singing] From the mountains, To the prairies, To the oceans white with foam, God bless America, Our home sweet home-
Man: Pinko!
Meemaw: Screw you! [singing] God bless America!