Georgie: What's he doing here? Y'all getting a divorce?
Mary: No. No, he's just here for dinner.
Georgie: Oh. Welcome, Your Holiness.

Georgie: What are you doing?
George: Separating the whites from the colors.
Georgie: Whoa, that's racist.

Georgie: Maybe you should go across the street and apologize.
George: I can't do that.
Georgie: Why not?
George: 'Cause if I do, it sets a bad precedent.
Georgie: What's Nixon got to do with it?
George: What?
Georgie: You said "bad president," like Nixon. You know, this guy.

Georgie: Okay, in my defense...
Meemaw: You have no defense. You're an idiot.
Georgie: That was a big part of my defense.

Pastor Jeff: Mary, George, I can't thank you enough for this.
Georgie: It was our pleasure.

George: Hey, I haven't seen the pastor. He go home?
Mary: He hasn't come out of Georgie's room.
George: Maybe he found Georgie's magazines.
Mary: He's a man of God.
George: You're adorable.

Pastor Jeff: For so many months, our little parish has been struggling financially. But by the grace of God and his provision, we have received the most donations in church history! Praise Jesus! Praise Jesus!
Sheldon: So it's all Jesus, we don't get any credit?
Missy: We need to start our own church.
Sheldon: They don't pay taxes. It's a very sound business model.