George Sr.: Hang on. What did you think was gonna happen when we sent him to high school?
Mary: I don't know, that he'd learn stuff, and then, come back home and be my baby forever.
George Sr.: Mare, it's good for him. He may start college in a couple years, what happens then?
Mary: Off the top of my head, he and I share a dorm room.
George Sr.: You know I'd laugh at that if I didn't kind of believe you.

Mary: Well, Sheldon's been spending quite a bit of time with this Libby girl, lately.
George Sr.: Yeah, so?
Mary: So isn't he a little young to be hanging with teenagers?
George Sr.: Oh, he's only young on the outside. Inside, he's an old man.
Mary: I'm being serious.
George Sr.: So am I. And with that bow-tie, he's old on the outside, too.

Mary: How's it going?
George Sr.: Well, I think I figured out the problem.
Mary: What is it?
George Sr.: I'm a terrible mechanic.

Adult Sheldon: And, like Mother Nature's piñata, geodes contained a secret surprise inside. But you didn't have to suffer through a birthday party to enjoy it.

Adult Sheldon: It's called perfect cleavage when gypsum separates this cleanly. I was so proud of Tam for not making an immature cleavage joke.
Tam: Look at me, I'm touching cleavage.
Adult Sheldon: Until he made one.

Adult Sheldon: We searched for tektites in a nearby ravine. Tektites are natural glass formed during meteorite impacts. They also bear a close resemblance to raccoon feces, so I wisely adopted a "no touching tektites" policy.

Adult Sheldon: What was happening was, like many men before me, I was being seduced by the exotic world of geology.

George Sr.: Hey, Georgie, if you ever find a girlfriend, maybe you can go on a double date with your brother.
Mary: She's not his girlfriend.
George Jr.: And I can find one I'm just not looking.
George Sr.: We gotta get that Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue away from him before he's ruined forever.

George Jr.: How come he gets to tie up the phone and I can't?
Meemaw: Because what is happening in there is called a miracle, and God-fearing people do not get in the way of those.

Meemaw: Sheldon's got a girlfriend. What are the odds?
Mary: She's not a girlfriend, it's more of a mental rapport.
Meemaw: That's where it starts.
George Sr.: I did win you over with my superior intellect.
Mary: It was your motorcycle and you know it.
Meemaw: Good thing it wasn't your masculine physique, because that is long gone.
George Sr.: Why do you think I kept the motorcycle?

Sheldon: "Geologists lead a sedimentary lifestyle." Libby, that is a good one.

Sheldon: So why did it take people so long to believe in continental drift, when it's obvious that Africa and South America fit together like a puzzle?
Tam: No, they don't.
Libby: People didn't understand continental drift because they didn't understand sea floor spreading. ... What?
Sheldon: I'm both threatened and delighted by your brain.
Tam: I'm just delighted by it. [looking at a globe] They do fit. That's nuts.

George Sr.: Oh.
George Jr.: Oh, what?
George Sr.: You didn't mention she was black.
George Jr.: Was I supposed to?
George Sr.: No, 'course not.
George Jr.: Then why bring it up?
George Sr.: It just wasn't what I was expecting.
George Jr.: What were you expecting?
George Sr.: It's a big school. Why are you right here?
George Jr.: They've got some books in there about Martin Luther King. Maybe you should go read one.

George Jr.: You know spying on kids is creepy.
George Sr.: I wasn't spying on kids, I was s-spying on your brother.
George Jr.: Why won't you just go inside?
George Sr.: Well, then, it wouldn't be spying, now would it?

Tam: [to Libby] I don't know what's more beautiful, your mind or your eyes.
Sheldon: Tam, please. We're eating.

Sheldon: Are you saying that without geology, there'd be no theory of evolution?
Libby: Charles Lyell taught Charles Darwin the Earth was much, much older than anyone thought, which gave Darwin the courage to figure out all species evolved over billions of years.
Sheldon: That's good. I can use that to humiliate my pastor at Sunday school.

Adult Sheldon: And so, our little social circle grew from two to three. An early example of how people are just drawn to me.

Meemaw: So what do you think, George? Is it time to have "the talk" with him?
Missy: What talk?
Mary: No talk. Nobody's talking.
Sheldon: If "the talk" is in regards to human reproduction, I already understand how that works.
Mary: How do you know that?
Missy: I told him.
Mary: Oh, Lord.

Mary: What grade is she in?
Sheldon: Eleventh.
George Sr.: An older woman. Nice.
Sheldon: Most everybody's older than me. Why is that nice?

Mary: So how was school today?
George Jr.: Sheldon's got a girlfriend.
Missy: What?
Sheldon: That's not true.
George Jr.: Oh, yes, it is. I seen him talking to her at school.
Meemaw: Sheldon Lee Cooper, you dog.
George Sr.: Is she cute?
Sheldon: Compared to what?