Jim Quote #19

Quote from Jim in the episode Funeral

Audrey: Mary. We're so sorry.
Mary: Thank you.
Jim: Well, I didn't know him long, but, uh, I loved that guy.
Georgie: [nods] He felt like y'all were long-lost friends.
Jim: [voice breaking] Oh, here we go.
Mandy: Come on, let's get you some Kleenex.

Jim Quotes

Quote from the episode A Baby Shower and Testosterone-Rich Banter

Mary: Hi, Jim.
Jim: Hey, Mary. Good to see you. You looking for some tires?
Mary: Actually, I'm looking for your wife.
Jim: Oh. You're not gonna yell at her again, are you?
Mary: No, no.
Jim: Okay, you sure about that? 'Cause I wouldn't mind seeing it.

Quote from the episode Community Service and the Key to a Happy Marriage

Georgie: Yeah, life would be so much easier if they just realized how alike they are.
Jim: Don't say that. Don't ever say that.
Georgie: We're alone in a closet. You said I could speak my mind.
Jim: Yeah, yeah, but not that.
Georgie: So where?
Jim: Nowhere. They, uh... they'll know.

Quote from the episode Community Service and the Key to a Happy Marriage

Jim: Why are you arguing with her?
Georgie: What? I was just trying to be a good husband, and take Mandy's side.
Jim: Okay, you know a great time to take Mandy's side? When you're alone with Mandy. And when you're with Audrey...
Georgie: Take Audrey's side.
Jim: Okay, there's hope for you. When you're alone with me in a closet, feel free to speak your mind.
Georgie: Seems a little complicated.
Jim: Oh, it is.

‘Funeral’ Quotes

Quote from Meemaw

Meemaw: I know this is hard for everyone. It's certainly hard for me. But no one... is more upset with George's passing than the Lone Star Beer company. That flag is at half-mast. [laughter] On the other hand, there's a lot of cows out there that are breathing a sigh of relief. As the king of brisket has put down his fork and ridden off into the sunset. [laughter] And, uh, I'll tell you something...
Missy: Why are they laughing at Dad?
Georgie: 'Cause they love him.
Meemaw: ...that I always kind of kept to myself, but... I wasn't always a big supporter of George and Mary being an item. As a matter of fact, whenever he came to visit, I would always invite Mary's slutty friend Janice over, hoping to catch his interest. [laughter] Hey, Janice. Thanks for coming. You're a doll. [Dale looks back] Anyway... George only had eyes for Mary. And of course brisket. [laughter] And over the years, he surely earned my respect. He was a good man. [voice breaking] And I will always be proud... to call him my son.

Quote from Adult Sheldon

Pastor Jeff: Before our final prayer, would anyone else like to say a few words?
Mary: Missy? [Missy shakes her head] Shelly?
[Sheldon stands up and walks up to the microphone]
Sheldon: I've been thinking a lot about the last moments I had with my dad. It was morning, and he was leaving for work. He said, "See y'all later." And I said nothing. I regret that. I could have said "bye" or asked him for a ride. Or told him that I loved him. But I didn't. I barely noticed he left. So many times that I didn't notice my father. I hope he knew how much I loved him.
Adult Sheldon: I wish I could tell you I said all those things. But I didn't.
Mary: Shelly? [Sheldon shakes his head] [Mary shakes her head to Pastor Jeff]
Pastor Jeff: Let's bow our heads in prayer.
All: Our Father, who is in heaven, hallowed be Your name...
Adult Sheldon: For a long time, I focused on my father's shortcomings. Now that I'm his age and have kids of my own, I realize he was just a person doing the best he could, and he did a lot. I didn't say it at his funeral, but I can say it now. I loved my father. I will miss him forever.

Quote from Mary

Pastor Jeff: And now George's loving wife Mary would like to say a few words. Mary.
Mary: Thank you, Pastor Jeff. Um... [clears throat] I met George in high school. Well, I was in high school. He was an older man with a motorcycle. [light laughter] I'd like to tell you he caught my eye, but actually it was the motorcycle. [laughter] [voice breaking] I'm sorry, I can't... do this. I am... so angry. [sighs] George and I had our ups and downs, but we were finally in such a good place, and then he... left. [crying] He left all of us. I- How could you do that? [Meemaw stands up] I am so mad at him. I'm mad at God, I'm mad at myself for not trying harder while he was here. [Meemaw goes up to Mary] This wasn't supposed to happen. [Mary sobs] [Meemaw hugs Mary] [Georgie hugs a crying Missy]