Episode Recap
In Germany, after Mary tells Sheldon “absolutely not”, he points out Europe is the birthplace of the modern railway system. Mary says it was also the birthplace of the guillotine, but he’s not playing with one of these either. Sheldon argues he’s a college senior and knows more about trains than Richard Trevithick. Who? He built the first steam locomotive, Sheldon explains. Mary is adamant: he is not going gallivanting around Europe on trains by himself. After Sheldon claims German children ride the trains alone all the time, Mary tells him when he becomes a German child, they’ll talk. After Sheldon storms off to his room, an exasperated Mary asks “Richard Trevithick?”, wondering how Sheldon knows this stuff.
After her argument with Sheldon, Mary is delighted to find a letter from George in the mail. In the letter, George explains he just got their latest phone bill and it was a whopper, so he decided to try the good old U.S. mail. George says everything here is fine - “a little crowded since the tornado, but it's bringing us together”. George struggles to get in the bathroom one morning as Missy’s in there. “And our granddaughter is getting more fun every day.” George plays peekaboo with CeeCee but winds up making her cry. “You'll be happy to know your daughter made a new friend. Taylor. And they've been hanging out a ton.” As Missy heads out, George wonders where she’s going all dressed up. When Missy explains she’s meeting Taylor, George wonders when he will get to meet “this girl”. Missy says “soon”, but George is just pleased he can finally get in the bathroom.
Ten days later, George is pleased to find a letter from Mary in the mail. In the letter, Mary says she was so pleased to get George’s letter. It reminded her of the time he was in Vietnam and wrote letters home. Only this time, she’s the one in a foreign country and the enemy is Sheldon. George chuckles. Mary mentions just the other day Sheldon wanted to go riding the trains around Germany by himself, but she put a stop to that. “Good”, George remarks to himself. Meanwhile, Sheldon is on a train and turns to the man next to him to say he’s disobeying his mother. “Ssh”, Sheldon tells the man.
As George sits at the kitchen table writing a return letter, he tells Mary she would be proud of how her mother is handling losing her house. When Meemaw comes in to take one of George’s beers, he explains he’s writing Mary a letter. Meemaw figures he’s too cheap to pay for a phone call. George points out one call is like a tank of gas. Besides, he says, it’s nice they are writing back and forth. When Meemaw utters an “mmm”, George wonders what her problem is. Meemaw says her house blew away and she’s not even received a stinking postcard. George suggests that she should write to Mary first, like he did. “Well, I’m not her cheapskate husband”, Meemaw retorts. “Heads up, I might kill your mother before you get back.”, George jokingly writes.
In Germany, Sheldon is planning his next train journey to Frankfurt - home of the Frankfurter - when Mary knocks on his door. After she comes in to ask if he wants a drink, an awkward Sheldon tries not to give away that he’s up to something and to quickly get Mary out. Sheldon turns down a beverage, prompting Mary to ask if he’s sure. Sheldon snaps and asks why she’s badgering him. Mary wonders what’s going on. Is this still about the train? Sheldon, fearing he’s been busted, nervously questions, “What train?” After Mary guesses he’s mad at her for not letting ride the train alone, Sheldon agrees he is. Mary says when he’s a parent, he’ll understand. “I guess I will”, Sheldon replies. After Mary leaves, Sheldon turns to a letter he’s writing to Missy, admitting he’s got a secret he needs to tell someone, or his head will explode. Back home, Missy is intrigued… until she reads on. “The other day, against Mother's orders, I rode a train by myself.” Missy scoffs, “What a loser.”
At Dale’s house, he is playing his guitar and singing “I Walk the Line” while Meemaw writes a letter to Mary at the kitchen table. “I moved in with Dale, which has been great. He's been so supportive and patient…”, Meemaw writes before she is distracted by Dale’s playing and asks him to play a different song. He tells her he’s working on that one. “My last nerve is what you're working on”, Meemaw retorts. When Dale insists you’ve got to practice to get good, Meemaw wonders what he’s practicing for at 74. Dale argues that this is his house, and if he wants to play the guitar, he’s going to play the guitar. Meemaw reminds him that he said this was also her house. “And in your house, there's a guy who plays the guitar, and he's getting pretty doggone good.”, Dale claims.
Back at the Coopers’, Georgie is excited to see the latest TV Guide has arrived. Spotting Julia Roberts and Lyle Lovett on the cover, he wonders what she sees in him. After George mentions women love musicians, Georgie remarks, “Man, I got to learn to play guitar.”. When his girlfriend Mandy asks why, Georgie answers, “So your love for me will deepen?”. “Nice save, Romeo”, his father adds. After Georgie finds another letter from Germany, Mandy comments that it’s sweet that George and Mary are writing to each other. Georgie claims it’s just because his dad’s a cheapskate, but George says it can be both. Mandy still thinks it’s sweet. When Georgie offers to write Mandy a letter, she begs him not to. After Georgie asks why, Mandy tells him his spelling makes her sad. Georgie argues he could use small words.
George sits at the kitchen table, reading Mary’s letter. In it, Mary tells him that she really loved his last letter. “Who would have thought that I would have a love affair in Germany and that it would be with you.”, she writes. Mary says she misses them all so much, but it sounds like everyone is doing great. “By the way,” Mary continues, “Missy's new friend Taylor - is that a boy or a girl?” “Missy!”, George shouts, jumping up from the table.
In Germany, Mary reads George’s latest letter, in which he included Polaroids of her granddaughter and “her American boytoy”. George tells Mary not to feel bad for being confused about Taylor. He is a boy, but George insists he’s on top of it. Back home, George confronts Missy in her bedroom about Taylor being a boy. Missy points out she never said Taylor was a girl. George points out she never corrected him when he assumed Taylor was a girl. As Missy feigns ignorance, claiming not to know who said what, George tells her that is the last she is seeing of Taylor. “Dad, it's not what you think.”, Missy argues, “He doesn't like me like that.” After George argues there’s no way a thirteen-year-old boy doesn’t like a girl like that, Missy reveals Taylor’s actually fifteen. Missy reiterates Taylor “really doesn’t” think of her that way. “The hell does that mean?”, George asks, only to catch on when Missy gives him a knowing look. “So, he's like a... gal pal?”, George asks. “Bingo.”, Missy says, to George’s relief. When Missy asks if she can go to Taylor’s house to watch a movie, George questions whether there will be any other boys there. After Missy says no, George gives his blessing. In his letter to Mary, George writes, “It's a different world, Mare. I'm proud of Missy for keeping an open mind, and, shoot, I'm proud of myself.” At Taylor’s house, as he and Missy make out on the couch, she pulls away for a moment to tell him that she told her dad he’s gay. “Okay”, replies before they resume kissing.
Back at Dale's, he approaches Meemaw on the couch to ask if she’s seen his guitar. He couldn't find it and was sure he left it around here. Meemaw flatly responds, “That’s weird.” Dale then asks if she hid it. “I can't believe you would accuse me of such a thing”, she says. “Did you?”, Dale asks. “Did I what?”, Meemaw replies coyly. “Hide my guitar”, Dale clarifies. “♪ Because you're mine ♪ ♪ I lost my mind. ♪”, Meemaw sings. Dale demands she give it back, but Meemaw insists she will only return it under certain conditions. He points out the guitar has been there longer than she has. Unfazed, Meemaw asks if he wants it back. After Dale asks what her conditions are, Meemaw explains he can play it all day long when she’s out of the house. Dale finds that’s reasonable. “I’m a reasonable lady.”, Meemaw insists before adding, “Number two: You cannot play the same song for more than five minutes.” Dale protests, saying that’s not how practice works. Repetition is the key to mastery. When Meemaw offers ten minutes instead, Dale accepts her terms. “It's in the closet behind the raincoats.”, she tells him. As Dale retrieves the guitar and starts to sing “I Walk The Line” again, Meemaw heads off to find the egg timer.
At the gambling room, Georgie is writing a letter to Mandy. He gets hung up trying to spell beautiful, so he settles on “pretty breasts” instead. When a male customer wants to cash out, Georgie asks if it’s creepy or romantic to “sneak into the bathroom to watch a woman shower”. The customer says romantic, which is what Georgie thought, so he writes, “And when you're alone in the shower…”
On a train, Sheldon converses in German withs the conductor who is checking his ticket. When Sheldon tells him he is lucky to have this job, the conductor admits his wife left him. Sheldon is sorry for him, but argues that just gives him more time to ride trains. “Weirdo”, the conductor exclaims as he walks away.
At night in Dale’s bedroom, he is kept awake by Meemaw snoring beside him. After he nudges her, the snoring temporarily stops. But when it starts up again, Dale gets out of bed and goes round to Meemaw’s side to spray something up her nose. Meemaw wakes up alarmed and wonders what he’s doing. Dale explains she was snoring, but she argues that’s no reason to stick something up her nose. She counters that if anybody snores, it’s him. “I mean, just look at that honker.” Dale says that’s not very nice. What’s not very nice, Meemaw argues, is him violating her nose. Dale insists it won’t happen again, but since she’s up, why not let him spritz the other nostril? “Don’t you dare”, Meemaw warns. By the way, she adds, he farts all night long. Dale argues it’s because of her cooking: “Stop feeding me fajitas”.
On a German train that has stopped at a station, Sheldon writes a letter to Missy. “Dear Missy, I'm currently on my fifth train ride exploring Germany and the nations of the former Austro-Hungarian Empire. It's often referred to as a dual monarchy because the Hapsburg ruler was both the emperor of Austria and the king of Hungary. Speaking of hungry... strudel.” Sheldon steps off the train to buy a strudel from a cart. As the conductor’s whistle blows and the train’s engine hisses, it pulls away from the station. Sheldon tries to run after the train, shouting “Wait” and then “Warten!” “That’s German for wait”, he adds. Adult Sheldon explains that, as we can see, they did not warten.
Sheldon stands at a pay phone, speaking in German as he attempts to make a collect call home. Meanwhile, back in Medford, Missy is lounging on the couch when the phone rings. She picks it up and hears a German operator asking if she'll accept the call. Missy hesitates, remembering her dad says it’s expensive, but Sheldon quickly interrupts, insisting it's an emergency. Missy accepts the call and then asks "What?", clearly frustrated. Sheldon explains he’s stranded in Weinheim, Germany and can’t call his mother because he lied. Missy gets another call and, despite Sheldon’s request, switches the line. Missy tells Taylor she’s not doing anything… Back in Germany, Sheldon hangs up when he realizes Missy has gone.
In Sheldon’s bedroom, Mandy reads Georgie’s letter about watching her in the shower. When Georgie comes in and sees her reading his letter, he decides to leave her to it. After Mandy remarks that now he decides to give her some privacy, Georgie realizes it was creepy after all. Mandy confirms it was but, after saying she’s going to get a shower, she tells Georgie she might leave the door unlocked.
In Germany, Sheldon describes his predicament in German to two police officers. One of the officers tells him it’s okay, they speak English. However, Sheldon claims they don’t speak it as well as he speaks German, before continuing in German to ask for a free ride. As the two officers step aside to discuss, they decide they don’t want to spend an hour with him in their car. One officer returns and suggests calling Sheldon’s mother in Heidelberg to pick him up, since he mentioned she was there. Sheldon reveals he lied to his mother. After the officers note that’s bad, Sheldon feigns contrition and agrees, before asking about that ride… Ultimately, Sheldon sets off on foot, facing an 18-kilometer walk to Heidelberg.
Back home, when George walks into the steamy bathroom, Mandy exclaims “Oh God”, while Georgie yells for his father to get out. As George retreats, Mandy asks her boyfriend why he didn’t lock the door.
In Germany, Mary is writing a letter to George. “I've been sitting here staring at your picture, thinking about all the years we've been together and how I may have taken you for granted the last few. I do appreciate you, I do love you, and I'm sorry I don't say it enough... or say it at all. So... rest up because when I get back, I'm gonna show you how mu…” Mary is interrupted by a phone call from Missy, who explains Sheldon is in trouble. Mary thought Sheldon was at the library. Missy reveals he isn’t; he called and said he’s stranded somewhere on a train in Germany. When Mary asks when this happened, Missy admits it was two or three hours ago. “What?!”, Mary exclaims. Missy says the call is expensive, so she should go. After Missy hangs up, Mary says to herself, “I’m gonna kill him.”
When Meemaw emerges from the bathroom, she finds Dale holding some pillows and bedding. After she asks what he’s doing, he explains he’s going to sleep in another room so they don’t bug each other. “And leave me here all alone?”, Meemaw asks. Dale thought she’d be happy. Meemaw admits that her nose might be happy, but not the rest of her. “Aw”, Dale says, moved by this. Unless he’s going because of her snoring, Meemaw wonders. “Alleged snoring”, she adds. Dale claims he’s going deaf in one ear because of her “alleged” snoring. Meemaw thinks there must be a way to compromise. “Compromise? There's no compromise. You won't let me spritz your nasal passages.”, Dale tells her. Meemaw points out that even if she did, it wouldn’t stop the tear gas coming out of his pants. “Onions in, onions out…”, Dale complains.
As Sheldon’s walk to Heidelberg continues, a small Daschund starts chasing after him. He runs away but trips in a field, sending his shoe flying. Meanwhile, Mary tries to phone the police and, in German, asks if they speak English. They do. “My little boy is lost at a train station. No, I don't know which one…, “Mary explains, “Um, he's, uh, five foot ten... Well, he's little to me!” Mary says “never mind” after a dishevelled Sheldon walks through the door, with dirt marks across his face, his shirt half untucked, and a missing shoe. After Mary asks what happened to him, Sheldon simply says “tough day”. “At the library?” Mary inquires. “Yes,” Sheldon claims. Mary asks about his missing shoe. “When I was leaving... the library… a wild dog attacked me.” “Oh, no”, Mary says. “I fought him off, but at the price of a loafer.” Mary notices his backpack is missing as well. “I guess he got that, too.”, Sheldon says. Mary remarks that it all makes sense - if that’s what really happened. “It is”, Sheldon lies. After Mary suggests he go lie down, Sheldon agrees, saying he’s tired after everything that happened. “At the library”, Mary adds. “At the library”, Sheldon repeats.
Back in Medford, George reads another letter from Mary at the kitchen table. “Instead of punishing him, I'm letting him think he got away with it. The guilt is eating him alive. I wish you were here to enjoy it with me.”, Mary wrote. Missy walks in with Taylor and greets her dad. Missy asks if it’s okay for her and Taylor to listen to music in her room. George says it’s fine as long as they close the door so he doesn’t have to hear it. As they walk off, George jokes to himself, “Probably gonna listen to show tunes.”
At Dale’s house, Meemaw and Dale are in bed at night. Dale wears ear defenders to block out Meemaw’s snoring. A fan on Meemaw’s side blows against Dale, sendings his farts away from Meemaw. As “Blue Danube” plays, it’s punctuated by Meemaw’s snoring and Dale’s farting.
